chatterbox chick

Bonjour! Comment allez vous?

2011-09-25T16:15:00.008+08:00

So here I am again.

I've rather missed blogging. I write in a journal now. But not that often & sometimes I feel silly because you wonder "What would this look like when I look back on this?".

But you know what? I have just looked back on my old blog posts and I realize how amazing and lucky I was to be able to express my feelings and thoughts of those moments in my life. Seriously, it brought tears to my eyes.

I've been feeling sort of down lately. And I've been beating the feeling back but it's a hard battle within myself. But looking back on these posts and some of my chatbox comments, I realize how lucky I've been.
I've realized that there are/were people who care and I've recalled the happy times. But all this nostalgia is a little bit scary because it's putting me back in a vulnerable place.

Anyway, how much time has past! There was that one post about being honoured to have Chef Jochern as my Head of School & now HE IS! So yes I've started college.
And then there was that post about going back to Sabah to do my license which never happened btw. And the posts while I was in Sabah which seem so long ago even though it was only less than half a year ago.

This place really is for posterity. I hope I can keep adding to it :)

Yours truly,
Azureen

I usually won't do this but..

2011-02-13T17:48:00.002+08:00

OMG. I IZ SO BORED.

i have NOTHING to do.

Well, I could clean my study table?

I could continue to read I Capture the Castle?

I could go jogging? Pffft..

Come on la. Let's go do something instead of rotting in front of this computer.

Let's see how much I can accomplish today.

Hide yo' kids cuz she iz back :)

2011-02-09T01:11:00.002+08:00

What an awesome title no?

So I got back on Sunday and yes I'm only blogging now because...I want to?

Anyway, there is too much to tell so if you want to know EVERYTHING and not be able to get a word in edgeways then I suggest meeting me.

However, I'm planning on making a Vlog so if I ever do make and post one, you can just watch my awesome-ness there.

Yes, I'm rather refreshed from my holiday and I'm just as full of myself as ever.

Not really, I feel like I look like crap which I probably do but honestly? Who has time to care? I have much better things to do than worry what other people think I look like.

But what helps me get through the day is this mantra I like to say.

I don't just say it to myself, I say it everywhere and to almost everyone.

If you can guess what it is. Kudos. You know me pretty well. No you do not get a prize.

If not, meh, whatever. You haven't been exposed to my brilliance enough. AHAHA.

One of my closest friends Em, unwittingly thought me to have a mantra during one low point in my life and subconsciously I must of retained it. And here we are today. A more awesome me!

Seriously, I don't think I'm that great but I don't want to beat myself up over every little mistake I do or flaw I have. So get over yourself. I did. Almost.

Gute Nacht.

2011-01-26T08:07:00.003+08:00

There's not a lot of things I can't say right now.

I feel a bit unsafe. But not for reasons that are physically threatening.

I've been listening to Maher Zain a lot recently.

Honestly, his music makes me feel calm and relaxed.

It's such a nice change compared to the "Oh my boyfriend left me, Oh I got together with a guy, Oh I think he's perfect, Oh you don't know what you're missing" that's so prevalent in music recently. And yes I'm talking about that singer. Hahaha.

Okay, it's not just her but you know, those songs about getting the guy, losing the guy, 'everlasting' love, ended love..blablabla. Why not listen to something that is...I don't know how to explain it. It's too hard.

I'm not saying that I'm not into pop culture. I like dance music and music that makes you happy but I will never understand people who purposely listen to sad songs about love all the time. Lain lah if you're listening about struggling through obstacles and overcoming them or something like that. But if it's about some stupid dude leaving you or something like "Cintamu *insert word here*", then screw that man. I have better things to do than be sad and melancholic over THAT.

Anyway, I don't know why I'm rambling again.

Oh yea, it's my blog. I can write on here and not give a monkey's arse whether someone laughs at me or not. Because when I try to talk to some people about these kinds of things most of the time they laugh. And it's not even because they think it's a silly idea. It's because they're too dim to get it. HAHA.

Oh that reminds me of something my mum told me about recently.

Oh I love her :)

NOT MINE! Whoopee!

2011-01-24T22:41:00.002+08:00

You're not meant to be bub.

And I am finally assured, I made the most perfect decision ever.

HAH! *in your face*

Kenduri and a whole lotta laughs :D

2011-01-23T09:26:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, out of the blue, my aunt decides to throw a kenduri for my arwah atuk on my mum's side.

There wasn't a lot of activity since like my mom, my aunt is a one woman army.

All I had to do was carry the folded and unfolded clothes into the room.

Anyway moving on,

After the men finished reading Yassin, they were ready to eat. But basically, someone forgot to cook rice. By the time the rice was cooked everyone was pretty hungry.

Before that the men busied themselves talking and the women did the same. Along with admiring the babies! OMG, i loooove my nephews. They're amazingly adorable.

Ayrique is very hyper but he is still nice. Tapi kedekut juga budak tu. What to do right? He's an only child and hasn't learnt to share yet. Haha.

Shafiee/Syafie (I'm not sure how to spell his name)

He is ADORABLE. Big eyes and a cheekiness around women ;)

And he's soo sweet. He just gives all the toys back to Ayrique whenever Ayrique starts getting bossy.

Moving on to the food that my aunty made in the shortest amount of time.

UH-MAY-ZING. love love love love love. My favourite was the curried pineapples. Yum.

After eating, we all sat around for the conversation that must follow good food. My aunt was trying to 'spread' the air conditioning around the room by windmilling her arms. Silly lady.

Later on, my aunties kept asking me to call up mum to make her jealous (they're such kids XD) so I went to get my phone but it couldn't work for 3G but my cousin Nadia leant me hers and it was so nice to see mum's face properly and being able to move around. I dunno, 3G just feels more natural compared to Skype.

Basically my aunt grabbed the phone and went around introducing everyone who was present but with superstar names. We had Angelina Jolie (my grandma), Brad Pitt, Tom Kurus, Jackie Chan and etc. It was a whole load of laughs and it was nice to sort of have mum there.

Ayrique's face when he saw mum on 3G was hilarious. He was confused and not sure how to react.

Even after almost everyone left we didn't really end because Nadrah ordered pizza and Zani was around so we were basically talking and we showed him Big Bang Theory. Slept around 12 since I was so tired and the guys were watching football and here I am now.

It's hard to describe everything and make it a short post. I think I'll just make a Vlog next time to make it easier if it's a really long and amazing day. I miss making Vlogs.

Ciao bella

Me and my cousin (Don't be jealous)

2011-01-22T15:30:00.004+08:00

After school for her and the end of a day for me

Don't be hating that we be so fly

Smiling always helps

Married in 10 years?! horrified

2011-01-22T15:09:00.004+08:00

Last night while we were eating my cousin-in-law kept making fun of me and asking when I was gonna get married.

*side-note*

I notice that my male cousin-in-laws (I don't have any female actually) love to make fun of me in any way. One gives me the nickname hippo -_-' and one likes to ask me when I'm getting married. Both are actually really nice guys. They just tease me. ALOT.

Their wives/my cousins say that it's because they like me so I just bertahan saja la kan? What to do? I'm so like-able. Haha.

Moving on, I was getting a bit annoyed so I told him that he'd have to wait another 10 years maybe till I get married. So it's sort of like a bet.

I'm putting this information here so that hopefully one day in the future I can look back on this and go "OH that is so silly of me".

Oh and I do hope it's not really at 27 or 28.

I meant the 10 years part more as a metaphor. As in, I ain't getting married anytime soon buddy. My excuse? To be awesome first without a man. The man shall just add to my already infinite awesome-ness XD

Before I can be comfortable with anyone, I have to be comfortable with myself.

Día Nueve.

2011-01-22T08:20:00.002+08:00

So hey y'all.

I'm still here and honestly, it's a bit of a struggle. More with myself than anything else.

Unless I have something to do and even the days when I'm out and about, I miss home. I miss my family. Okay, yes I'm staying with family but in this context they're relatives.

In my opinion (if you're close with your family especially), no matter how much you get on with your relatives, there is nothing like being at home with your family.

But anyway, yesterday was a pretty good day even though it started a bit late.

As my dad once said, aku macam menganggur saja. No one was home except my aunty and while she was sleeping I was listlessly walking around the apartment, reading my book, going online, etc.

My cousin did invite me out but my stupid phone has been having problems and messages don't appear properly. To me, my day started at 2 because that's the time I finally bathed. Haha.

But in actuality I guess it started at 4 when my cousin finally came and picked me up.

We planned to go swimming but my cousin didn't have a swimsuit so we went to 1Borneo to get one. Got it and then went to eat because I didn't really eat lunch and we're always ready for food ;)

So then we drove to the Sport Complex and after a bit of this and that finally managed to park inside. My cousin was scared that people were gonna recognize her and stuff.. Dither dather. Haha. Anyway, when she finally jumped into the pool I couldn't really follow because it was cold as flipping fish. Seriously, I put a foot into the water and I instantly shivered.

So while I was bracing myself to jump in suddenly this guy with a freaking thick Russian accent who was training some kids in the adjacent pool came up to her and said "Excuse me, no swimming. No one can swim in here."

Obviously being the scaredy-cat I was horrified and a bit embarassed.

My cousin's reply was "But I can."

Here's the deal, the pool closes to the public at 7pm and we arrived there at 7pm.

Now just to jump ahead, we got to swim and the reason is that 1. My cousin's former coach invited us to swim at that time and 2. To summarize, my cousin can swim at anytime she wants.

I don't want to go more than that so voila, we got to swim and the pool was 8 feet deep yo.

But I managed to do a lap or too with her laughing at me for my non-existent backstroke.

There were lots of kids training at that time but we had a small section for ourselves.

So anyway, after that we changed and went to pick up my cousin's husband.

I was already rather tired but we went out to eat dinner at City and it was sushi! Yum!

I tried out a bunch of new things I would have never tried so in it's own way it was a nice new experience eating with them. Then I was sent home.

Honestly, my cousin is really awesome. She and her hubby escorted me upstairs to my aunt's apartment. I get freaked out having to go upstairs at night.

So anyway, I had a lovely day and I thank my cousin Nadia for turning what I thought to be a boring day, interesting.

The female cousins I've been hanging out with have been amazing and really made sure that I enjoy myself and I love them for that.

Okay long post done.

Adios.

2011-01-18T11:04:00.003+08:00

So hey,

I'm here doing well. So far so good.

I do get those feelings of missing home incredibly a few times a day.

I miss being able to hug Hazeem anytime I want and I miss hearing his voice telling me stories about Flapjack and Chowder.

But I'm enjoying myself.

Life's all about experiences but we can't just sit on our asses waiting for something to happen. We have to put ourselves out there and hope for the best. Which is what I did and it's interesting.

Sometimes I get a bit scared but I think of it as a chance to conquer some fears.

To anyone and everyone who speaks ill of me : Vai a vite da soli :)

Going to go officially register soon.

Auf Wiedersehen.

Hola amiga!

2011-01-16T11:28:00.002+08:00

So this is my 2nd day here.

I'm too lazy to blog properly.

So here's my itinerary:

Arrived at 4.30

Went to my aunt's house

Hung around watching the salon at work.

Went out to eat dim sum at Fook Yuen (Fook Yun, Fook YuEn, Fuck You)

Had a laughing festival

Skyped with the family back home

Stayed up till 1.30

Woke up at 9

Now i'm going for breakfast. Bye :)

Uncertainty

2011-01-11T15:44:00.002+08:00

I had another post that I wrote but I decided against posting it.

I guess I'm not that successful at not censoring myself. Pfft.

Anyway, I'm sitting at home right now and I am rather hungry. If my mum says she's eating out with the boys then I'll have to go cook. Which I don't mind. But somehow the thought of cooking is making me depressed.

If you had the thought that I'm spoilt, I don't know how to cook or whatever then you better just stop thinking then. I know how to cook and I enjoy cooking. It's just for reasons I prefer not to mention, cooking is so very depressing to me right now.

I know I sound snarky. I just want to bring up the fact that whenever someone reads a blog, they usually think that what is written is the whole story and from there, they make assumptions. Well they, you, me, everyone shouldn't. It's wrong and stupid. You never know the full story. Even when someone tells you something, unless you were there and know the history and background, you will never know the full story.

Anyway, my head is really full of thoughts nowadays and I think the real reason I started blogging again is because this is just another way to get rid of some things I would not say out loud. I don't really know who to talk to here.

That's why I need a change of perspective and I can't wait for it.

I am nervous and a bit anxious but I guess that's perfectly normal.

May I be able to face any challenges with a level head and may I come out a better person.

A Change of Perspective.

2011-01-10T01:10:00.004+08:00

I'm blogging quite a bit now. But I miss 'writing'. It's quite freeing.

So, life is a bitch. But you can't tame it.

What brought that on right?

Well, I don't want to go into detail but my mind is in turmoil right now.

I may not be doing much physically but mentally I can't seem to rest unless I force myself to do so. So honestly, I don't complain about boredom too much because I'm never actually bored. If I'm not doing something I'm thinking about something and it sort of consumes me until I shake myself out of it.

I'm stuck in limbo and I know some people out there are probably happy to hear that. I know this is paranoid but sometimes I feel like there are people who actually wish me the worst or bad luck and that's the reason why sometimes things seem to go wrong in the most peculiar way.

I feel alone. But not in the same way I did 5 years ago. It's hard to explain.

I sound emo don't I?

Ugh, I hate that word. People used to call me that. And it just sounds so wrong.

I honestly think that it is a very annoying kind short form for emotional. Like 2 more syllables is so hard to say? Human kind is becoming more and more lazy. Not physically but mentally. What happened to the balance? Anyway, the only physical aspect someone would work on is only for themselves and rarely anyone else.

Pfft, I sound insightful. Full of bullshit as some people say XD

I'm actually trying to stay up for the Real Madrid v. Villarreal match. Why are all the football matches I want to watch held when I should be asleep?

Goodnight then.

In love with Latin (actual Latin, not Spanish) recently.

Aequam memento rebus in arduis servare mentem

Remember when life's path is steep to keep your mind even.

Insane Laugh

2011-01-09T00:41:00.004+08:00

Mwahahahahahahahahhahah

I figured out my quizilla account password.

I hadn't logged in to it for ages. Since I was Form 2 to be exact and I was so worried that my 'great works' would be lost forever to me.

Actually I only posted a couple 'chapters' of a fan fic.

When I was somewhat active on that site I only had like 40 readers?

So I was curious and decided to check up on those stories and my last 'great work' had almost 900 readers. Well views. Whatever. The title itself must've been alluring enough XD

So I decided to get back on. Though I doubt I'll post fan fic again.

There is a certain thrill when I am able to write a story and people like it. Or at least have a look at it. No matter how lame they look to anyone else, I'm quite proud of my so-called work. I was still 13 when I wrote it and looking at it now I can't believe how the story seems to sort of portray my life now.

There is a certain power in the written (or typed) word and it's rather intoxicating.

2 things have already happened from my story.

i met my favourite band and i'm 18 this year.

booyah. in your face suckah XD

Epiphany

2011-01-08T22:04:00.002+08:00

So today I went to The Star Education Fair in KL.

It was my first time going to any sort of education and it was quite enlightening.

I think I figured out a lot from my time there.

My dad hit it right on the nose to the first booth we went. I left it feeling excited about my prospects. Others just left me mostly high and dry.

It's really amazing when you find someone passionate about a career they've had for ages. Honestly, I'd be honoured to have someone like Jochen Kern be my lecturer.

Anyway, the rest of the fair was so and so. Towards the end I basically asked the same questions more than 5 times and I had to write my particulars in equal numbers. I think I could've filled out those forms with my eyes closed if I wanted to.

None of them really know to stoke the passion of a teenager. Or is it because I had already found my passion ages ago and because of my over thinking, it just made me confused?

Anyway, the Education Fair was a success I think. Even though it felt repetitive after a while.

Well..that's all that happened today. I'm boring I know.

Other than that, I got my hair trimmed. Still trying to grow it out but I had split ends.

That's it.

____________________________________________

Oh, one last thing.

I notice that I censor a lot of my feelings here. It's like I care what people think of what I feel. I shouldn't. Some things are meant to be kept personal but now, unless there will be actual repercussions or repercussions that I actually care about, I shall write what happens and what I feel.

Because I'm human and this is my blog.

I write this for posterity.

I want my future self to see that her past self was more fragile, that feelings are normal and to remember that there are lessons learnt and should not be forgotten.

Buona Notte.

Eye Bags

2011-01-08T00:43:00.002+08:00

Just to keep the momentum going I shall write here this very early morning.

Because I'm curious, I decided to watch True Beauty on tv.

My first impression?

1. Fake.

2. Fake.

3. Fake.

4. Vain.

5. Vain.

6. Stupid.

8. I want to puke just watching the (forgive the childish-ness) yuckiness.

9. Any woman attracted to the men are idiots.

10. Any man attracted to the women are....men.

I like that last bit. Because we know it's true ;)

Time to sleep. Gute Nacht.

Silence Is Truly Golden.

2011-01-06T17:50:00.004+08:00

Life is unpredictable. Yet I have this uncontrollable habit to plan and at least lay out the foundation.

I miss the days when my only 'huge' decision was whether I wanted to enter Science or Commerce for upper secondary. I made that decision in Form 1 and I was so proud that could make up my mind that early and I followed through with it.

5 years later, here I am. More confused than ever. At one point (this was near SPM) I regretted picking Science (Bio, Physics, Chemistry) and felt that I could've probably truly flourished in Commerce but that was because I felt like I should take up business as a degree.

Now however, I don't want to do that. That is not my passion and I've always said to do what you're passionate about. So why do I find it so difficult to carry through?

It's easy for people to say "Always go and work in what you're passionate about"

But no. It's easy to say if you want to be a doctor, a pilot, an engineer. More or less, your job pays well. It's almost guaranteed you'll be rich or at least pretty comfortable. But what if your passion does not guarantee you'll have a money for food or a roof over your head?

It does boil down to money. Because if you didn't have money to feed you at least once a day I doubt you'll be happy. Sure, you can stand it for a month, 2, 3, maybe even a year. Past that time frame are you really sure you'll feel as happy?

My friends who know me know that I love languages, travelling and interacting with people. It truly is a passion but due to various reasons I can't exactly pursue what I want. And some of my friends know that I had a few opportunities and I couldn't carry through with them.

It eats me up inside thinking that I missed such amazing opportunities but c'est la vie no?

But it hurts. And it stings when I see others have the chance to pursue what I want so badly. And I hate it when I see spoilt kids with not an inkling of what they want to do, play a fool and not realise how lucky they are. I treasure every opportunity given to me and I guess that's why the disappointment is so bad.

As Eric Hoffer said "Disappointment is a sort of bankruptcy - the bankruptcy of a soul that expends too much hope and expectation"

It's all God's will though and it's a flaw of mine.

I'm learning to let it be though and as I said to my mum once I accepted this "I don't care anymore. Whatever the heck happens, happens."

God knows better and I shouldn't fight fate so much.

I am ACTUALLY back :)

2011-01-05T16:26:00.002+08:00

HEEEEEY.

My usual greeting nowadays.

So I've really ignored blogspot for ages but I really blame it on SPM.

And yes people, this girl has graduated from high school :D

I am officially done with that. But I miss it. APIIT/Sapura has been the greatest thing that has happened to me and I'm a bit sad that it's over.

I'm thankful however for the opportunity I had and I'm very happy that I had the most amazing time there and met the most amazing people. They helped me change in the most positive way though I sometimes wonder whether me talking so much is a blessing or a curse.

Without moving to that school and meeting those people who I truly call friends, I'd never have known how to express myself and accept myself better.

You guys are special people in my book.

I can hear Tara go "You're welcome" once she reads this. Haha.

Anyway, since SPM is over (grueling 3 weeks of my life) I've been doing absolutely NOTHING.

That might sound crazy to you but it's been heaven for me. I'm honestly happy at home being able to potter about, going online as much as I want and not having to shower till late. There I said it.

I mean, I've got out a bit with friends and loads with my family but no I have not gone looking for a job and no I have not started school.

My reason is that I've always been rushed to choose what I want to do and now I'm just gonna take my time to figure it all out. I get stressed out nowadays thinking about the future. In my own way I'm a control freak. I want my life to turn out a certain way and I hate not being able to control that. It doesn't help that I want so many things and none of them seem to have a way to fit. Mad aren't I?

Anyway, enough bitching and moaning. Good news is that I'm going of to my hometown in Sabah to go learn to drive. I'm traveling alone so no mom or brothers. I'm gonna go live with my aunt and hopefully she won't find me a nuisance for a month or so.

It's gonna be a eye-opening and independent making experience. I'm a bit worried and nervous but in my mind, if I don't go out there and do something like this I will never know what it's like.

What it's like to live away from your family whom you're so close to and basically live with 'outside' people. Okay, I'm pretty close with my relatives but I've never been in any position of having to depend on them.

I know this is odd but I'm also getting ready for when I do have to completely separate myself from my family for any reason. I can survive not being around them but I don't think I could live without them completely. Does that make sense?

Someone once told me I rambled on here but who cares? I can write anything I want.

Oh and I never realized I changed my background. It's pretty though :)

Auf Wiedersehen.

I know you missed me

2010-07-25T17:03:00.003+08:00

Was geht ab?
What's up?

So things that I've been doing lately:

1. Involved in my school play, The Phantom of The Opera.

2. Got involved in my school's Swimming Gala. Got silver medals ;)

3. Trying to bloody study for SPM and yet FAILING miserably.

4. Trying to practice for my piano exam esp. my scales and ALSO failing miserably.

5. Trying not to lose my sanity.

I'm enjoying the stuff in my life right now. I try to be positive and because of that the negative things come spilling out in a rush sometimes. Tara knows how negative I can be and yet she still stands by me. *sings* I'll stand by you~

Anyway, I don't know why but I feel rather depressed when I blog. Maybe that's why I stopped for a bit. I will definetly get back to this properly after SPM but for now, expect this to be the last last last LAST post in forever.

So I'll make this long. Or try.
Um....Oh yea, finally tried playing my brother's new XBox.
I could get addicted. So yea, no games for me anymore till after.
What did I play? This game called Fable. It's quite interesting.

Oh yes, another list is coming to me.

Games I'm going to postpone sleep for after SPM :

1. Sims 3
2. Final Fantasy (12 and 13)
3. Fable
4. All the other games I shall find. MWAHAHA. -_-'

Okay, that was a short list. Anyway what else?
I got called back for the AFS program I applied for ages ago. I don't know if I'll actually get it. I talk too much.
Oh and that's one more thing. I kinda wish I was back to being quiet. I feel like talking is just wasting my energy and yet I can't help but do exactly that. Talk talk talk talk TALK.

I guess that's what happens when an introvert finally comes crawling...wait, scratch that BURSTING out of her shell.

I've thought of so many things I'm gonna do after SPM and yet I feel like wtf I'm gonna be stuck being useless forever. Azureen. Stop being an ass. Hit your books hardcore and STFU.

Okay, I get I can't make this too long. The feeling of guilt has already come and is beginning to overwhelm me.

Ich bin mein eigener Meister.

wtf Zureen. Shut up.

I'm gonna try harder

2010-04-01T23:23:00.002+08:00

Well, you wouldn't really know unless you talk to me right?

Why haven't I been blogging. Same reason as why I don't really practice scales or do much revision (or any). LAZINESS.

I'm not looking forward to much anymore.
I think I'm living one day to the next looking forward to things.

I have to say this.

You disgust me sometimes.
butistillloveyoudeepdown.

cough cough hug :)

2010-01-29T21:50:00.002+08:00

Sooo hi.

Um, I'm sorry we haven't talked in ages.
But don't take it the wrong way. I miss you.

I just wish you'd ask me "What's been going on in your life?" and mean it.
Not have me explain and stare off into space.

Haha, that's just me talking to blogger.

I don't have a boyfriend. Yet :P

Laily just asked me that question that day. "When will it be our turn?!"
And I said "Never mind. It the wait doesn't matter if he's worth it." :)

I believe that.
But one part of me thinks, BULLSH*T.
AAHAHA.

Oh, I'm ill.
I've got the flu (sticky green mucus yay..pfft), sandpaper throat and a bit of a fever y'all.
It iz de awesomest possumest bomb.
Not.

Like how I described the aqueous substance running out of my nose? Yes, I know you do :)

This is gonna be a random run-around post with thoughts leading to no where.

I LOVE MY FRIENDS.

Old and new don't worry.
I don't forget people easily. Names yes. People, no.

Anyway, celebrated Eddie and Ax's birthday today at school coz we won't be able to celebrate their ACTUAL birthday on that day coz Eddie's is during the 1st Assessments and Ax's I'm not sure.
These guys are awesome people. Love the Cina and the Bitch :D

Listening to Falling Down by Space Cowboy. It's a fun dance song.
Meh, I'm into dance music now.
I don't hate sad songs but I prefer not listening to them. I get sad and why put yourself down when there is so much to bring you up?

I wanna talk about school like I used to about Kota Kemuning school but honestly:

a) I'm too mentally tired to form a post.
b) It's a HONESTLY gotta be there to understand thing.
c) I don't think anybody cares :'/
d) My thoughts are getting more and more personal.

Not a bad personal, more like I think if I blab about what's really going on inside my head, people won't understand and..stuff.
Or worse, people don't actually care.

I'm happy at school and I love talking to everybody.
But there are things, I just don't want to repeat awkward-ness between friends.
I've been more happy in Sapura for 4 months than in SMKKK for 4 years.

How high I am on the outside is how low I feel on the inside :)

Sorry Blog :/

2010-01-22T23:50:00.003+08:00

Random things I just wanna say here because I feel bad for abandoning blogger for age and plus it's my blog and I can say stuff I want but I won't go overboard.

1. I'm drinking an entire jug of water by myself because I feel utterly dehydrated though God knows why.

2. I love my religion beyond what words can describe at this time in my life :)

3. School has been uber fun and I enjoy EVERY second. Yes, even the boring parts. Coz it means I get to spend time with friends who are amazing and make me laugh so much.

4. On that note, although I laugh and feel like school is amazing, something must be wrong somewhere in me. I've been having 'amazing' headaches everyday. I act normal but see me rub my temple? Yea, 'amazing' headache is on.

5. I love my friends :) I just love you guys.

6. Lynn & Cat have decided to randomly say the names of all the guys just to see if I would blush. And I do. -_-. Sue me. I'm "innocent". :P
But I don't really mind coz what else would give my blood the exercise it needs to rush to my head. PFFFT.

7. Tara and me have decided to help Haiti.

8. I'm very proud of the Form 5's and especially my class for being TRULY supportive of helping Haiti :)

9. Um, I enjoy wearing tudungs :P
I started my mengaji classes and obviously you have to wear a tudung right? But I never use the conventional tudung. I just wrap these amazingly colourful shawls we got from Sabah around my head instead and it looks awesome :)

10. I want to become a better Muslim can you tell?

11. Screw anybody who doubts me or tries and convinces me otherwise :)

12. Life is going good.

13. I know I'm pretty much just crapping now because it's late.

14. Homework is piling up.

15. I want straight A+'s plus SPM.

16. I want to be able to jump up and down and scream at the top of my lungs due to happiness due to the A+'s in SPM.

17. I want straight A+'s in all my exams.

18. I think I should sleep now.

19. I still have to work on mine and Tara's proposition for Mrs. Chee.

20. I wanna find somebody to love. :P Though that's not important. I think?

SANDWICH!!!! :D

2009-12-17T15:28:00.002+08:00

Bought shoes for the wedding today. Love love love them :P

It took FOREVER to find. Actually almost bought one pair from Sachs which I already fell in love with but the saleswoman had to be a bitch and my mum and cousin decided to take our business elsewhere.

Pfft..

Anyway, offered to top up my cousin on whatever she needed for her shoes and JENG JENG JENG!

SANDWICH ALERT!

Tall, dark hair, grey eyes. *drool*

Had a mini freak out fest :D

Talked to his sister, who is a baby. Pffft. Made her cry -_-'

God help me.

Anyway, did not talk to him. I know I'm lame -_-' but his mom was around. What could I do?

Don't criticize me back at school. I'm hurting enough. HAHAHA.

Made a 'strong' pinky promise with Nadrah that on the very low chance that if we ever see him again, we shall go '*drool* Aren't you that guy from that commercial?'

Screw being thought of as weird. As long as I can hear his voice.

I have someone else to fantasize about now ;P

December 14th

2009-12-15T18:46:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday to some very special people :)

Happy Birthday to DAD!

What can I say. You're my dad and you'll always be in my heart :)

Happy Birthday to Sara my cousin.

You know you're gorgeous and you're being made into an honest women in a few days time ;D

And last but not least,

Happy Birthday to my dear Chiqa!

Thanks very much for caring about me even though you've only known me for a few months. I really can't explain how much you've become an awesome friend.

Oh, don't get me anything from Singapore. I'd feel bad :P

I love you bitch :D

Hey Y'all

2009-12-13T22:26:00.002+08:00

I actually have nothing to say at this moment in unsuspended time.

I just feel like I should say something on this blog.

I use to be able to write alot.

I think I can still do that but I kinda feel embarassed suddenly.

It's like, why the heck am I writing these things? People don't care.
Plus I alway ramble and get excited over things that other people take for granted.
I make something insignificant seem like such big news.

There I go again.

Anyway, will be off soon. I'm soo happy.
Relaxation and fun!

I need it. I'm so stressed just at the THOUGHT of studying & SPM that it has rendered my brain paralyzed.
Not to mention the fact that my house seems like a total disaster area due to packing and actually having 5 people in the house for more than 2 weeks already (-_-')

So to put it in that Sabahan way : 'Samak kepala aku'

I need to make a list.
It helps to make a list. Either mentally or just writing stuff down.
Sometimes when I don't know what to do and like I have too much stuff going on I'll do that. However being mentally paralyzed (plus having to organize the trip) I can't seem to do even that. Help..

Hope this trip will relax and refresh me. I need to get out of the house and forget about everything and just really enjoy myself. Haven't really been doing that these hols.
Seems like there are so many activites and events that I feel like I haven't even enjoyed the holiday properly. Scheisse.

Break break break break holiday holiday holiday holiday vacation vacation vacation vacation.

Achtung Achtung!

2009-12-12T00:13:00.002+08:00

Thank you Yaz for making my mind up for me to go out with you guys :)
Thank you Chiqa for getting me Cat :)

I love my present.

I loved the day.

I loved the way you guys suprised me :D

I cannot believe you stood in a stinky toilet for more than 2 minutes just for me! *huggles*

Hugs for everyone. Except the guys. Haha.

Oh and the cat's name is Shella Twix Cat.

Yesh. I know iz weird. -_-'

Hazeem wanted Shella, I wanted Twix but I always call it Cat. So yea. It has a first, middle AND last name :)
We are weird siblings. a) coz of the above and b) coz it seems like a girl name but we always mention it as a he.
Yes. LAUGH!
But I still love Cat :)

No, not you Catherine.

Haha.

So anyway, thanks again.
I love and my baby bro loves it.
He hugs it to sleep every night.

So much for it being MINE (-_-')

Smile When You Don't Want To

2009-12-12T00:04:00.002+08:00

I can't wait to go back!

I miss my cousins.

I miss the ocean breeze.

I miss the food.

I miss my relatives crazy humour.

Ngeeeeeee...

Oh I wish it were more than 5 days.

Aye

2009-12-04T14:30:00.001+08:00

To go or not to go?

I love you Mum :')

2009-12-02T22:21:00.002+08:00

I love my mum the whole wide world and water park! :)

That was Shafique's version of how much he loves my mum when he was a kiddie.
Hazeem's is a very quick "I love you full." HAHA!

Mine would change everytime asked.
One day it'll be 'a million.'
The next 'the whole universe!'
Another time I'd start listing everything I love and times that with a thousand million billion gazillion bazillion :D

So yea. I love my Momma.
I'm not afraid to say I'm a huge Mummy's girl.
And, it's hard to be separated from her :'(

I mean, if she were going on holiday and I knew she was having a fabulous time I'd be so excited for her.
If you knew my mum though, she'd not want to be on a holiday alone. She'd want all her kids with her.

But she's not on holiday, she had surgery.

It's to help her but I miss her dearly.
It was nice to spend time alone with her at the hospital today.

I love you Mom more than anything in the world.
Because, you ARE my world.

Zureen

Je'Taime Yo!

2009-11-28T23:16:00.003+08:00

Could you say that to a guy?
Would he laugh or would he find you weird?

That would be awesome.
I think I'll save myself for a guy who can smile/laugh when I say "Je'taime yo!"
If he exists. Which I doubt.

Btw, Je'taime means I love you in French :)

Anyway I always think that it's just something small and seemingly insignificant that will make you realise that the person is 'the one'.
Not a big proposal on top of the Eiffel Tower but small things that happen daily.
Like saying "Let's stay in instead and have a movie marathon!"

What am I talking about anyway?
I was suppose to just say I'm kinda nervous.

Oh well. I blabber.

Zureen

Take That!

2009-11-25T16:05:00.003+08:00

No, not the boy band my dad loves so much.

I updated my links list!

So TAKE THAT!

So no hard feelings yea?
Something was wrong with the apps thingy and I just figured it out.
It's not cause I didn't want to add you.

It's just that you weren't special enough! Hahah.
Kidding!

Don't hurt me :/

Sorry for being emo!

2009-11-25T15:46:00.002+08:00

No offence to all 'emo's' out there :)

I'm like that. I have several days of high or a REALLY high day and then I'll have a low point.
Like the graphs we learn =_=

It's literally like a sugar rush.

Anyway, I feel like being hyper.
When are we going out Apiitian's?!

Oh wait.

I've not charged my phone. Again.

But hey, at least I'm not losing it anymore :D

Cepat laaah. I need a day out!

Tara or Lynn we MUST do some of those practical jokes we discussed!
I need to see some of those annoying faces again XP

Kidding, you guys know I love you and and and . . . . I'm blank.

Haziqah I still owe you my Pixie Lott CD.
Btw, say THANK YOU! to your mum for letting you stay in APIIT/Sapura :) *hugs*

Pssst. Listen. Come closer.

Closer.

Cloooser.

Your butt smells like roses ;D

Z

Philosophy

2009-11-23T14:40:00.002+08:00

Remember the show Timon & Pumba?
Remember their theme song?
No?

It goes:

Hakuna Matata,
What a wonderful phrase.

Hakuna Matata,
Ain't no passing craze!

It means no worries,
For the rest of your days,
It's our problem-free,
Philosophy!

Hakuna Matata!

Remembered it when me & Shafique were reminiscing about our childhood cartoon favs :)
Promised to show Hazeem 'The Lion King'. Imagine! He's never seen that Disney classic.
******
Anyway, someone told me I should write my philosophies and musings etc.
Always thought it weird but maybe by doing that I'll be able to feel like I'm not such a mess.

If you must know, sometimes I feel like such a schizo.

Musing:
Is anyone as schizophrenic as me?

One part of me says "Who cares? No one's opinion matters except my own."
The other is always afraid about what people think of her.

It's tiring when these 2 things/thoughts clash in my mind. Often.

So does anyone else feel that way or is my suspicion correct and I'm actually insane (in a bad way) ?

I hate Patrick :P slash Mutant Zombie Mannequin Robots!

2009-11-18T19:42:00.004+08:00

Patrick is a female dog!

Which Patrick? The one from SpongeBob of course! Patrick Star!
Wanna know why?
Read on.

Got to school and when I entered the class I saw everyone sitting at the back watching Jennifer's Body on Tara's laptop.
How did I know it was Jennifer's Body without watching?
I'm super psycho! Oops. I mean psychic :)
Kidding. She told me she'd bring it yesterday.

So anyway, watched Jennifer's Body intently for.. well as long as the movie was playing. Only took a pee break cause.. well.. I needed to pee. DUH!

It was a pretty good movie. Not actually scary but gory-ish.
Not as gory as District 9 though.
There were 1 or 2 almost-porno-but-not-exactly-porno scene. The first was the first kill. In the woods.
A teacher was telling us to fast forward/turn it off the entire 2 minutes it was on. Haha.
Yes, we watched it with a teacher with us. Not for the entire movie though.

Ok, malas nak cakap ttg Jennifer's Body dah.
But all I will say is that if you have an uncensored version.
Don't watch with kiddies or parents ;)

Then the stoopid boys were making such a big hoo-hah setting up the PS2. Female dog lah.
Me, Tara and Haziqah were trying to watch The Big Bang Theory.
Tara got pissed. Hehe.

So before Tara's mouth transformed into a sailor's (heh, sorry T) we went found an empty class, 4 Comm 2 and watched 4 episodes there. Damn funny!
Saw a cute blue sleeping bag on the floor. wtf right? Sleeping bag?
The B-Ball coach kept poking his head through the door and asking where Amirah was. He asked us what we were watching and when we said "Big Bang Theory" he gave us a weird look and left.

I think he thought about the other big bang theory. Haha.
Anyway, I say watch and prepare to slap your head in frustration at the stupidity.

Ooh, ooh! Mutant zombie mannequin robots! :D

Then we went back to class and found the guys STILL playing the PS2.
Boys and their toys. Ngeh.
Gave everyone in class at that moment a pack of Giotto chocolate and heard the munch munch of happy campers.
Boys went out to eat and me and Tara were talking-things-I-don't-remember-but-were-funny-as-scheisse :)

It was damn cold today at school for some reason. Thank God Faiz lent me his jacket :D
Yadayadayada with Tara.
Boys came back with more noise.

I borrowed Tara's iPod and listened to Fireflies by Owl City 10 times. Yeah!
Tried to go to sleep. iPod drowned most of the noise of everyone cheering at the football game the guys were playing.
Tara borrowed my bag which btw makes a very comfortable pillow.
Had Faiz's jacket as a padded out pillow/blanket. It's actually really comfy. Go figure. Something of Faiz's is actually comfortable. Haha.

Sicik teacher woke me up asking for the Giotto chocs she asked for. Gave her and then slept again.
When I woke up along with Tara, I went to the office to send in some forms.

Came back and hung about.
Decided to play SpongeBob SquarePants with some people and ohmygosh my throat is sore from the amount of laughing and yelling I did.
I was Plankton, Sherra my team-mate was SpongeBob. Other team Muh was Squidward and Faiz was Patrick.

Patrick a.k.a. Faiz Asyraf a.k.a. female dog was being very annoying. He thought he was so amazing. Pfft..
Thought of doing a Jennifer at one point. Didn't though cause I'm human.

He kept egging me on. And you know how competitive I get. You don't? That's good :D

Oh, and a Form 3 almost suffocated in the cute sleeping bag I mentioned.
Looks can be deceiving yo.

So anyway, yeah. My day went well.
Was actually super-duper-callifragilisticexpealidocious fun :P

Plus it RAINED! Talk about my favourite weather :]

p.s. I think I'm getting the hang of writing about school again [:
p.p.s. I love school but not as much as the people in it <3
Zureen

Coz I'm TNT!

2009-11-17T19:57:00.002+08:00

Star Search was today and OMG I actually loved every minute of it.

Okay, the bloody nervous part was a beeet lame but the whole process is pretty cool. That was the point in joining Star Search. Experience AND to try and get over my stage-fright.

It's working I think. It was faster getting over it this time. I didn't have to mess up for the actual performance. Just to get a few tittering fools think I'm shy and stupid. pffft..
It's works you know. When you have something to prove, stage-fright doesn't actually go away but you just don't care anymore :)
Well it's like that for me. I don't know about anyone else.

I was in the instrumental category. I won 3rd. Out of 3. HAHA.
I never thought about winning anything when I signed up actually. I was just like EXPERIENCE!
Plus, I don't mind because the trumpet and saxophone solos were amazing! They had a band behind them but honestly, they were good.
Sax took 1st place. :)

The bands were pretty good. Ngeehh.

But The Unknowns ROCKED!

I totally love those Form 1 boys who performed TNT by AC/DC.
Ambitious risk but it totally paid off :D

Even during the sound check me and Tara were going OMG! They're so good!
No offence but they were even better than the Form 5 bands.

The singer was great even if he was a bit nervous. His guitar solo was N-I-C-E. He used a screwdriver.
Drums rocked out like yeaaah!
Bass and guitar were EEEE.. LIKE CUTE but at the same time cool. haha.
And they have cute band members. I mean how can that not be cute? Form 1 and doing a serious rock song. Respect as rockers earned :D

Other bands and how I felt their performances were:

*drum roll*

The Jeng Jengs, I Wanna by AAR
Band was good. Vocals were so-so but the lead singer was cute :)

The Sigit, (not sure)
Band was pretty good but they totally drowned out the lead singer. Stage performance rocked though. Guitar solo was cool :D

Losing Maya, Rock cover of I Wanna Love You by Akon
Same singer as The Jeng Jengs. I liked this actually but I would liked it more if he had a better voice.

The All Apiitian Rejects, I Wanna by The All American Rejects
They were good but Brian? Your voice dah hilang.
Bassist ada a bit sesat. HAHA

There was one more band but for the life of me I can't remember their name.
They did Dirty Little Secrets by AAR but...can I say pity?
But I feel for the lead singer I really did.
But like Tara said, at least he knew he wasn't good.

I can't really talk about the vocals because.. can I say all of you sucked? Haha.
Okay, no they didn't suck they were all good but I just didn't really feel anything for the vocals category.

Apologies.

i liked your screwdriver ;]
Zureen

p.s. i hate blogger when the formatting goes haywire.

Screw Me. Ugh.

2009-11-16T23:02:00.002+08:00

Nerves, nerves, nerves.

I really hate being nervous. Especially when I know that I am nervous but it doesn't outwardly show. I just like the nerves to get over with and then I can get on and do what I have to do.

The nerves always just suddenly come out during the most annoying times.

Like my audition. I had to mess up the 1st song and then only when I felt like I had something to prove did I totally lose all my nerves.

Can I go back to that?

Listening to Gravity by Sara Bareilles now and I feel like I'm gonna cry. It's 11.09pm and if I do, I know my eyes and face will be all puffy. Like it ain't now? Haha..not.

It does feel like a bit of the nerves are dispersing along with my tears though.

Fudge. I wanna cry. If it can get rid of the nervous energy, self-restraint let me cry!

My problem, self-restraint. Watevs I guess.

I wanna practice but I can't cause I'd wake up the entire house. Playing softly has no point right now. Or it seems that way to me. I really should sleep now but I just want the nervous energy to go away.

Nerves, nerves, go away.
Come again another day.

Zureen

Kay-Gee!

2009-11-16T17:46:00.004+08:00

That's a private joke yo..haha

Anyway, went on the field trip today to Pusat Sains Negara. Translated into National Science Centre for those non-understanding-malay people :)

Cat had to call me and freak me out by saying "Azureen. The bus isn't here!"

Scared the shit outta me. I thought the bus left already.

The bus ride was okay. Watched the 1st season of Gossip Girl on Cat's iPod. I think I might get hooked :)

Hazeem the guy from my class and not Hazeem my brother was annoying me and Cat at first by asking "What movie are you watching?". REPEATEDLY.
First I answered "Hazeem Get's Killed" and he gave me the WTF look. Asked again and Cat went and said "Ok, it's Hazeem Get's Killed 2" haha.
In the end I took pity on him..and me and just told what-the-fish we were watching.

So arrived at the Science Centre and instead of being driven up to the entrance, we got left at the bottom of the hill and had to eat our breakfast of nasi lemak at the guard post. Amazing right?

When we got in we went almost-kinda-straight to the Da Vinci exhibition. First Mr.Mahen made us sit to watch a Science Show..ehh.
I saw Farah there. She's my mum's friend's daughter.
It's funny, next year she'll be part of the APIIT group instead of the Bukit Rimau group :]

The Da Vinci exhibition was pretty cool actually. I liked the fact that Da Vinci wrote everything backwards.
And we got to build a bridge just by interlocking some wooden poles. Most fascinating. I'm serious.

One thing that got me going "aiyah" in the head was all the physics-ness of some of the stuff. I only wish learning physics was as much fun as the way they laid out all Da Vinci's inventions and explained the experiments he did with them.

I really heart his paintings.
Although I didn't like some of them like 'Virgin of the Rocks' and 'St. Jerome' but it's the fact that every piece of art of his makes you have a reaction. An intellectual reaction that is.

There was one painting that I think was almost better than the Mona Lisa. It was just recently discovered last year and I think it's amazing. Simple yet the detail. Can you say L-O-V-E?

Obviously there was a huge part on the Mona Lisa and it's SO true about what they say. Her eyes really do seem to follow you. But I think it's just the genius of Leonardo who painted the shadows and light to do that.

I actually learnt alot of interesting facts. Won't post them here I guess coz I know I'm already boring you.

The rest wasn't as interesting. We took alot of pictures but they're on Yazmin's camera. Mine died -_-'
Ohh, one cool experiment is where you can see how you'd look like if you and another person's DNA were mixed together. I won't go into details coz it's more fun to do than hear about.

Like sex eh? HAHA.

Rest of the day went like:

-Indulged the girls with Giotto chocolates.

-Got into the bus and went to pick up the others from the Bird Park and Muzeum

-Watched more GG on the way back.

-All the way back Tara, Laily and Haziqah were insulting me.

-Got back and went straight to the music room to ask teacher for help.

-Learnt how to slide on the keys and hurt my thumb T-T

Etcetera etcetera :D

An epigram from Leonardo Da Vinci:

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag full of snakes expecting to pull out an eel.

Zureen

;'(

2009-11-15T18:17:00.003+08:00

Suddenly I feel rather down.

The realisation just hit that I basically did not really technically celebrated my birthday.

Mum did bake me a cake and took pictures but gah, she did it when I was all unbathed and stuff. She suprised me :)

It was nice but it did kinda hurt that nobody REALLY cared.
My cousin was over but as soon my mum finished taking pictures she and my brother ran off to play the PS2. -_-'

Wtf is that?

I think my mum felt bad for me on that day. Coz she sat next to me on the couch and hugged me and said some really nice things.
I mean, she does say that but not that often and especially not when I'm unbathed. Heh.

I really wish I had something remarkable I could have marked my 16th with but I guess it's too late now?

I do believe that 16 for a Malaysian isn't really something remarkable since we can't drive yet and yet freedom is far away till SPM but it still kinda hurt that I didn't really have a day that was just, not ALL about me but still especially thoughtfully dot dot dot

Hard to explain.
But I haven't really had an AWESOME birthday since I was 9.

This birthday I'm glad that lots of people wished me because all the time I was in SMKKK, no one really cared except Mauli.

But this year I got alot of calls saying "Hey, let's celebrate your birthday with *insert name here* and *insert name here* and *insert name here*" etc. etc.

No offence, it sounds awesome to celebrate my birthday with some others but be honest, do you really care about me or do you want a good excuse for a party?

I've been used an abused because I'm a great cover. Parents know that I won't do anything stupid and that my parents are involved in my life so people call me up, invite me out and as soon as a bunch of people I don't know and people who don't care to get to know me arrive, I'm pushed to the back and nudged to the side while they gossip about this shit and that shit and stupid shit.
Maybe I'm being mean but I do think that birthday-wise you're allowed to be a little bit selfish and wish the day were about you.

Plus I don't need anymore shit in my life.

I don't want to cry because I had to spend the day talking to myself.

I don't want to feel the stabbing pains of hurt because 'Oh we don't have any space for you'.

I don't want to have to talk about stuff I don't care about because that's the only way to communicate.

I don't want to be laughed at because they find it hilarious that I could be a certain way. Just because I never show you the real me it doesn't make me a freak to act differently from what you think I am.

I don't want, I don't want, I don't want.

I don't want to feel like shit just for being me.

I've learnt and now I'm not gonna be selfish but my mantra is:

Anything that makes me less than me,
Is NOT for me.

So no thank you,
I don't want to hang out with you.

Zureen

Science Fair

2009-11-08T08:35:00.003+08:00

Saturday 7th November

I went to school. Coz I'm soo awesome. :P
In the morning texted Cat to make sure she's going and she said "No I'm not."

Imagine.. I was already wearing my school sport shirt..

So I texted her back saying "You think it'll be ok if I didn't go too?"
Guess what her reply was?
"I'm totally shitting you. I'm going."

One word.
Bitch.

HAHAHA..

Nah. Had a good time.
Basicly only me and Cat were the only students manning a booth there.
The only other people there were Ms. Sugada and Pn. Salmah.

Did the experiment and I didn't expect it but quite a number of families and parents went up to our booth and asked us what it was about.
I was more or less tongue tied so thank God Cat was there to explain.
Some parents were really interested in the experiment and it was a joy to talk to them. Joking and what not.

I think it helped that the colours of the Food Test were uber pretty :)
Will try and put up the pictures of the test.

Oh, and pictures of the experiment and us (I think) were taken by this lady from Mac.
Cool eh?
Then we were 'interviewed' by Sam and the lady looked on.

Then we could go back.

Went back home, changed and then went to Subang Parade.
Went to Parkson's to look at clothes for Hazeem's friend. We got him Ben 10 clothes coz we never got him a present for his birthday. He really liked it :)

Anyway,
If you love me and feel bad for my birthday not really being anything, you'll get me a present?
Haha.. Desperate sounding much?

The sweetest present? A soft toy.
I'm not afraid to admit:

I think SOME soft toys are cute.

Okay, I know it sounds lame and I have not gotten a soft toy or bought one since I was 9 but everytime I go to Parksons and pass by the stuffed toys I always go look at these toys called Deglingo's. Totally cool things. If a soft toy could be called cool.
They have all these animals which are all like sewed on patchwork-like.

My fav is a hedgehog. It's spikes are all these cool fabrics mixed up and it's like made out of cotton and corduroy. But it's RM99. No one will get it for me. :(

Anyway, I doubt anyone will get me anything this late but it's always worth a try. HAHA.

Zureen

p.s. Sorry for the late post ;)

I'm late.. Again

2009-11-06T17:24:00.002+08:00

Been late for almost everyday of school except today.
Well late as in I enter around 8 plus when I'm suppose to be early.
Was pretty late for Bio 1 and had to dump my bag outside the Seminar Room and sit at the back. Blah.

Speaking of late.
Achtung!

FINALS ARE OVER!

And the day before my birthday too :D

I am officially 16 :)

Zureen turned 16 on the 5th November!

The sweet part hasn't happened yet.. :P

It being a Thursday and me being a good girl (yea right), I went to school.
Helped out with the Science Fair posters. It was quite fun.
Got lots of birthday wishes and Cat, Tara, Haziqah & Laily sang me Happy Birthday.
In the Aerospace Centre *wince*. In a room full of people *double wince*.
But I enjoyed it actually. Embarrassing but that has never happened before and it was nice.

Basically I'm trying to say that I did not really celebrate my birthday properly and anyone wanna bring me out? Haha.

Still, I appreciate the fact that people went up to me and said Happy Birthday and etc.

For the first time in a long time I feel like I won't be made fun of for just being me.
People get me and I don't have to dumb myself down to feel like I fit in.

So thanks everyone. You may not know it but just wishing me Happy Birthday and giving me a hug was enough to make my day.

So yea, THANK YOU

DANKE
SIE SIE NI :)

Zureen
p.s. there's an open Science and Maths Fair 2moro.
gonna gawk at potential new Apiitians and their parents. :P

Oi vei

2009-11-01T12:38:00.001+08:00

I think.

No scratch that.

I KNOW.

I'm gonna fail Physics.

I have a slim chance of passing Chem.

I pray to God I pass Bio.

Help..

I hate you Yazmin ;P

Zureen

Just Drink It

2009-10-28T22:51:00.002+08:00

Kids,

This is a personal message from the most amazing person ever. Moi.

*ahem ahem*

Did you know most people do not drink enough water everyday?
Did you know that only few people actually ever drink the required water to maintain our bodies pH level? (chehh. bio sesat)

Recently I have been just like that.
Now I am paying the price.

Semi-extreme dehydration is not a thing to laugh about.
It is serious business. Fatigue and nausea are just a few of the ill-effects from dehydration.

So save yourself now.
Get a bottle of water and...DRINK!
Keep drinking. And you know that you have avoided dehydration when you feel like puking water.

Life is like a river and our bodies are the lakes that are suppose to be filled by them.

*This is a personally awesome message from the most awesome person ever*
*She will personally kill you if you roll your eyes at this message again*

Just Drink It.

When you're up, you gotta come down. Way down.

2009-10-28T21:54:00.002+08:00

I'm breaking my own rule here but I'm not going to school tomorrow (I don't have any papers) plus I'm in the mood to blog.
It's due to the conversation I had in school about blogs. :)

Anyway real reason I want to blog is coz I have no idea why the heck am I so grumpy right now?
I mean, my brother just rejected my cooking is whatever but even before then I was already going to bite someone's head off.

The day was going so well and I had to have a pre-PMS emotional crisis at home. WTH right?

Wait, I know. It began when I threw up my lunch.
I just suddenly woke up and had to throw up. The food was forcing itself out the wrong escape hatch. Ok I know. EW..

I've been living uber unhealthily these past few days.
Sleeping late.

Waking up uber early.

Not even taking breakfast most times.

Not eating or drinking at school plus only eating one meal with one glass of water once I get back home.

Then locking myself in my room to study.

PLUS I've also been having regular inner freakouts.

NOT HEALTHY!

Thank you finals.
You made me the mentally/health-wrecked person I am now. :)
Pfft..

Can I turn back time? I feel awful at this moment.

I wanna go back to this afternoon when we were talking about ANU, blogs, buff guys, Jimmy Choo shoes and obviously Islam since we were having our test paper today. It was so fun.
Laughed like "OMG I haven't laughed that loud and hard since finals started".

I'm really thankful that I met such awesome people.

Oh, jangan bangga please..
I see your head swelling. Haha..

Oooh. You'll never guess!
I was asked to be someone's date to prom.
I think he was form 5. I think he was serious.

Don't worry my boobs. Dia tak hot.

Pfft. Muhtadee tried offered me by saying he'd rent a limo.
Puh-lease. I ain't cheap nor am I desperate.
He was like another version of Muh and honestly, that would be weird.

Darling, I'll go to prom with someone I chose (or approved), my friends or just by myself.
I don't need pity date because I'm a last resort so you won't look alone.

So basicly I blew him off by pretending that I hated prom and etc.
I think I was pretty convincing since Yazmin was pretty shocked. Haha.

Sorry to the guy if you're reading this.

Zureen
p.s. ladies never lower their standards

I think I'm falling for you :)

2009-10-18T21:25:00.002+08:00

LOVE that song by Colbie Caillat.

So yea, I know. When was the last time I blogged?

Huda.. Hi. I know. I'm totally neglecting my darling bloggie.

Kay, finals are in about... from today... 4 days away!
ARGGGGGGGHH. OMG!

Let it be known now that I will most definetly fail something. I hope not. But I bet so. *sob*

Was revising add maths (which means doing the exercises for one chapter) and I realised that I know more than I did at the beginning of the year. YAY!
Unfortunately, it's still not enough to pass the effing exam.
And I so wanted to make Miss Sugada proud.
What? I like to make teachers I respect happy that they thought me well. *sigh*

SORRY :(

School has been amazingly fun. Laughing alot is a must.
Getting exasperated by people is fun coz in the end I laugh like shit & they laugh at me. Pfft -_-'
In a nutshell. People are great (apart from a few wackos) and lessons are way more interesting now. "Play hard, Study hard" seems to be the Science Stream motto in APIIT.

I have nothing to say except I miss seeing all the boobs.
Sorry I'm such a recluse and so hard to contact.
And I'll be on a blog hiatus again for a while.

Let's make a list before we leave the blog eh?

Subjects and my chances of passing them:

English - Very Good

BM - Anorexic-ly Slim/Non-existent with my teacher who is as strict as hell with the marking.

Civic - "Who the heck cares?"

Biology - So-so if I can fit all the 'revision' in time.

Chemistry - Ditto

Physics - *Laughs until tears come out and then starts crying*

Mandarin - Ok. With a dramatic drop from A to C.

Add Maths - *Goes into depression*

Mod Maths - *Prays*

History - "I don't have a History textbook! Lend me for a day?" *Looks for pills*

Islam - "OMG! Where's that revision/notebook that I bought from teacher?!"

*hyperventilates*
I'm soooo depressed now. Save me.
I need a hug :(

Zureen *looks for chocolate*

I'm back like the Backstreet Boys :P

2009-10-09T21:54:00.002+08:00

Ok, I'm not a huge fan of the Backstreet Boys.
I'm being lame :)

But yea. I'M BACK!

Just gonna update to tell the world that I'm alive and I'm really enjoying my new school. For those of you who don't know. I go to APIIT now. Which btw will be changing its name to Sapura.
I prefer APIIT somehow but at least if I tell someone the school's name they won't say "What?! ARMPIT?!"

Mui estupido..

Anyway, might not be updating as frequently as before my computer conked out. Just coz I'm usually too tired to even walk to the computer and switch it on let alone sit in front of it for hours like I usually did.
Plus I know I should be studying. My finals are less than 2 weeks. NO DISTRACTIONS NEEDED.
Oh, and my internet is a b*tch sometimes. Oh well. The closest I'll get to a dog yea? Haha.

Anyway, I missed blogging :(
Haven't even been properly online in ages.
Been using my IpodTouch just to go and check Facebook but is otherwise useless to play all the 'cool' Facebook games. Heh.

There's a seminar at school tomorrow. Just when I thought I escaped going to school more than 5 days (like I did in SMKKK), I signed up to do just that.
Gah! I remembered when I went to school 7 days a week coz of all the activities I signed up for. Still, I actually do spend more time in school now.
Whatever I guess. It's a Bio Seminar. I think it'll be useful.

Okay, my mind is working at hyper speed. What to say? What to type?
Kay, outta ideas.
Need to sleep now.

It's lame but I really do need at least 8 hours of sleep now or else I will fall asleep in school. I actually did during Chem. Not a good thing coz I sit right in front of the teacher.
Thank God I managed to catch myself before I hit my head on the table and that my teacher was on the other side of the class. :D

Zureen

p.s. Farrah if you're reading thing. ILY boob! And can you just call the house and check if I'm there before you come over? xoxo

9th Day of Puasa

2009-08-30T12:19:00.002+08:00

Hungry.

Craving for 'mac & cheese' from Kenny Rogers.

But that craving will go away in about 7 hours time...

By then I'll accept anything. :)

________________

Just came back home.

Guess what!

I got my hair cut.

And yes, it is bloody short. Not as short as last time but still short.

I asked for a trim and she chopped off at least and inch and a half.

Seriously, I almost cried when she cut off the first chunk.

Then before the tears swelled up in my eyes I started thinking "Why did she do that?" and the answer came to me.. Split ends.

That bit of rational thinking stopped me instantly.

I vow now to never skip a routine trim.
Coz your hair can get damaged and you might have to cut more than you wanted.. :'(

Ok honestly I don't think my hair was that bad till she had to chop off an inch and a half but I guess she just wanted to clean it up because my hair has been an unruly mess.

The wavy ends are gone and my straight as straight hair has returned.
I don't know whether to be happy or sad. Kinda upset I admit.

Only one good thing has come out of this, I won't feel so guilty about letting my hair down in school. Even though people with hair till their waist let their hair down but I've always been a goody-goody and like to follow the rules.
There's no point in tying up my hair.

But...but...but...I'll miss the swishy movement of my hair when it was tied up and long :(

Heh.. I miss weird things..

*sob*

Gosh...almost an entire post dedicated to my now-gone hair.

imissyou hair <3

Zureen

p.s. I'm suddenly missing Deeba my best boob :)

Open Sesame

2009-08-24T19:03:00.002+08:00

Pleaasee stomach. Tolong diam. Hahah..

3rd day and it's getting harder.

Maybe it's the fact that Hazeem like coming into my room with his nuggets, butter cookies and chicken wings -_-'
Yes, I'm sure that's it.

Imagine half-dozing in your room with your stomach empty and suddenly this aroma of butter cookies wafts in....Hahaha.. So not making it easier for myself.

Me being the pig I am, I usually ask Hazeem if I can have a bit of whatever he's eating and he usually gives me some. Do you know how many times I almost asked him? But then I remembered that I was not suppose to be eating. Haha.

Oh well..

Anyway, I'm thinking about posting up any random stories/one shots/bits and pieces here.
I will probably.
Since people actually do read my blog maybe I'll get some constructive critism :)

Warning: I am a romantic-ish writer.

Too much romance makes a person *bluek* but I actually can't resist a good romance.
It has to be good. Not over the top without any sense of logic but romance that could actually happen.

don'tbreakmyheart
Zureen

Hey Stranger :)

2009-08-23T12:16:00.002+08:00

Hey everyone.

How are you?
Good good :)

How's Ramadhan been? I know it's only been two days but sometimes people give up so easily.

Me? No. I haven't given up.
There's some steel running through me :)

We had Merdeka Celebrations on Friday. It was very fun :)
Most of form 4 didn't attend -_-' but what can you do?
I still had fun with the ones who came and made new friends.
I took lots of pictures.
Though, I'm still steeling myself to put it on Facebook or not.
I guess I'll just jump in a put them on?

I'm still at the point where I'm still discovering new people and making friends.
It's a very cool process but very lonely when you aren't able to share it with your old friends.

You know, I love my old friends but being in a new school has opened my eyes to some of their personalities and actually very demeaning attitudes.
Being alone in a new school taught me how to stand up for myself.

And now I see how I've let a few people step all over me.
I'm done with that now.
I'm going to stand up for myself and not let people put words into my mouth or their ideas into my thoughts.

Arrgh. This is not suppose to be an emo post.

Anyway, I'll end it now.

I miss everyone but I've changed for the better and if you can't accept me growing up and standing up for myself then you shouldn't call yourself a friend.

Zureen

Pictures Galore! (no thanks to Facebook)

2009-08-19T21:28:00.009+08:00

My classroom is like an explosion of flags.

Lao Xi :)

Ms. Lela my class teacher :)

Joyce (:

"I swear to pretend to like everyone in class"
Ahahaha :P

Hazeem...
I know. Like my baby bro's name..

Never met a teacher that loves to pose -_-'

Trying to figure out if the table is actually made of wood :P

Sajak reading by Alia and a very busybody Daniel.

This is an APIIT boy's pastime in school.
Playing poker...

One gay gay..One happy gay and one lost donkey.
HAHA!

*caption*

Lynn: *evil face* What shall with do to Daniel today?
Eddie: Let's dress him up!
Daniel: *blur*

Picture is too hilarious to describe.
Can you believe that it was posed?

Cat looks so cute :)

Hard at work decorating the class.
That's me in the middle btw.. :P

This would sound so weird if it actually came out of my mouth but..
Malu sial...
Notice the bloody infamous blush..

Not so gay anymore...

I like this picture.
Except for the constipated looking Ax..

Zureen

Pictures For You!

2009-08-18T21:11:00.003+08:00

Some pictures to make you happy.
Not in order. :/

Eddie doing his Mandarin presentation :)

X and Cat. Yea, I know. X looks cacat :P

Dayana just chilling.

Arissa thinking about what else that can be done to decorate the class.

Iskhandar showing us his artistic side :P

Alia finally coming to school.

Sabrina who would not let me take a picture of her face at all -_-'

Zafran (picture courtesy of Arissa)

Isk. Posing? lol. (picture courtesy of Arissa)

The main lady herself. :) Arissa putting up flags.

I know the picture quality sucks.
I have no idea why.
Zureen
Tons more pics on Facebook.

Mauli's Getting Old!

2009-08-18T19:00:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday Maulika!!

You're 16 today!

May you live long and prosper :P
And not get H1N1 :)

You've been my best friend for almost 7 years now :)
We've had our ups and downs.
We've had to learn how to cope with our different personalities.
But we're still friends today :D

You're my piano buddy, gossip buddy and debate monster :P but you've taught me a lot and showed me how to stand up for myself.
So thank you & I love you :)

p.s. i'm sorry i couldn't go to dinner tonight

Zureen

Up :)

2009-08-17T19:33:00.002+08:00

Nope, didn't go see the movie Up.

You're crazy.

My mum has self-quarantined us from the outside world.

I don't mind so much.

I feel like I haven't had much time to spend with my family and by myself.

I am a family person.
But I'm also blessed that my family understands when I need to be alone. :)

Anyway, I'm up because school was pretty okay today :D

I'm content.

Had my insecure moments but overall content :)

Zureen

Piccies :)

2009-08-16T12:23:00.004+08:00

Ok, the pictures deigned to let themselves be uploaded.

I told you that the pictures suck.

Plus, most of the pictures weren't taken by me anyway.

The person who did also smartly deleted her own picture while taking these.
-_-'

Party pooper.

Anyway, enjoy or hate me for these uber lame pics :)

People waiting in the front entrance of the main building.
(side) Haziqah.
Still not sure how her name is spelt :P

Btw, please appreciate that I took that picture very randomly and people actually stared at me after that. *blush*

Faiz and Haziqah talking about God knows what.
Har Har. Pfft. :D

They actually hate me for taking these super candid shots.
But what could I do?

They didn't want to pose :/

That is Cat :)
Yet another person who did not want me to take a picture of them so I had to snap a candid :P
She retaliated by reminding me that she has a God-awful picture of me in her phone which she can spread in an instant. T_T

That's Laily and Haziqah's highly adorable but rather emo younger brother whom I don't know the name.
Did not take this picture.
Amirah did and she deleted her own. Grrr...

And those people?
That's me and Shafique in the car.
It was a grueling day at school.
But we survived :)

Zureen

No Pictures :(

2009-08-15T20:58:00.004+08:00

No pictures for now :(

The damned thing won't load.

Would post it on facebook (more likely not. heh) but my account got disabled.

Don't ask me why.

Will probably make a new one soon but am too lazy at the moment.

Pictures weren't much anyway.

Hopefully next week will be better :)

i like living in the fantasy world.
reality is just way too hard.
Zureen

Home

2009-08-15T08:49:00.002+08:00

Guess what time I woke up today?

7.30 -_-'

Not my usual 11am Saturday lay-in.

I blame as well as thank my clock.
It has stopped working so the hands are stuck at 12.45.
So imagine waking up, thinking there's school and that it's already 12.45.
I got up so fast it was amazing.
Then I remembered that there was no school.
But thinking that it was late already I went and had a shower.
Got out, got dressed, checked the tv and guess what time it was?
Only 8. Pfft...

Oh well, bangun awal, hidup lama.
Or something like that. My Mod Maths teacher says that alot.

***

Just came back from the pasar.
Don't ask me where. It's in KK somewhere...
I still don't know the name of the streets properly.
Seriously, I still don't remember what Anggerik which friend lives in.
I just go by, near the police station or near school? Hahaha

Anyway, mum made me wear a mask.
It wouldn't have been so bad if other people were wearing them but nope, we were the only ones.

But the reactions we got were irritatingly hilarious.
Which means, I was uber pissed that people kept giving us weird looks but tickled by the way people reacted when I went near them. :D

Irritating example:
Women kept giving us weird looks and were almost looking down on us.
I say almost coz the aunties shooting us with their knife eyes were short :P

Funny example:
The men. OMG. HAHAHA...
My mum was looking at some fish and this man was just glancing warily at her.
Then I went up to my mum and accidently bumped into the man.
He looked up, saw that I was wearing a mask and totally flinched and backed away.
Same thing happened when I was backing up and bumped into a man, he totally flinched and almost jumped back.
HAHAHAHA! Memalukan..
Pfft..Men.

Mum said I should have acted like I was really sick.
i.e. coughing my lungs out and sneezing like crazy.

Very tempted now.
Hey, if I have to be embarassed by wearing the mask I might as well have some fun with it. :D

Oh, dad said I can't go and see my friends at the Rakan Muda sparring comp 2moro.
My dad said that there have actually been around 1000 deaths in Malaysia relating to H1N1, nevermind what the papers say.
They're trying to keep hush hush.
So yea, too many people. I can't go. Kinda dissapointed but oh well.

I'm under quarantine too ya'know.
Not to keep people from getting a disease from me but to keep myself from getting a disease from other people.

I prefer to be safe, healthy and bored at home than sick, maybe dying after enjoying myself breathing in a disease. :)
But who says home is boring?
I've got the internet, the computer and all it's entertainment, tv, books, my art supplies and etc.

I felt like I haven't spent anytime at home anyway.
Seriously, leaving the house early and coming home late is pretty weird.
Most of my time at home has been in my room studying for the past week.
Then falling asleep on all my books and then the process repeats.

Home is where the heart is.
Zureen

I'm Baaack

2009-08-14T15:25:00.002+08:00

Look who's back from the short blog break..

ME!

Believe, would never have taken a break from blogging if not for the fact that I was having exams in APIIT and I don't want to look like a dunce on my first exam there.
I have to show that I have some brains kan?

Well my exams, well actually tests, are over!
Last paper was Chem.
Effing...pfft..
I think my Chem teacher hates me. Or just dislikes me alot.
Either way, it pisses me off.
I know I'll fail her paper and she'll probably have a silent gloat.
Have fun. Read your notes!?! Excuse moi. New student. Not comfortable asking notes from a guy who seems to want to avoid me. *fumes*

Anyway, guess who got an 84 on her first ever Mandarin Communications test?!
Me again! Haha.
I was bloody ecstatic.
Plus I didn't cheat at all in any of the exams so any achievements or fails are totally me.
So this achievement feels awesome.

I had less than a week to study for every subject. Mandarin, the words I tried to memorise like and hour before the exam.
So ngeee :D

Honestly, it Mandarin Comm is actually really easy.
And matching the words to the translations are A-OK s'long as you study the unit that's coming out.
Being 'rajin' pays off.
The part I enjoyed the most is when we had to copy out the essay.
Not to brag but I think for a newbie, my chinese characters were pretty awesome :P

Anyway, I have a few pictures of APIIT students but yea, it doesn't show much.
I'll post them up later.

My week was utterly turbulent.
Yesterday I had a silent breakdown.
Thank you Aishah (i'm not sure how her name is spelt) and Amirah for comforting me :)

One moment I felt part of the group, next I felt totally alone.
One period I felt connected to the class the next I was thinking "Omg. Culture shock much?"

I was up, then I was down.
Round and round merry-go-round.

Now, I'm in the middle.
I wonder which way I'll go?

But I think I found some really nice people. (:
I still need some adjustment. But maybe next week will be better.
After that is the August hols. Merdeka celebration is coming up in APIIT.
Will definetly take TONS of pictures.

I still miss everyone and wish I could join in like I usually did in SMKKK.
But I know it'll take time but people have been coming up and giving me a chance.
So maybe it's my turn to take a chance?

I'm in that transition period still.
I know I don't belong in SMKKK anymore. I know I'm not a student.
But APIIT still hasn't become "mine".
I still don't see it as my school. My alma mater (is that correct?).

Time.
Something I want.
Need.
Lust for :P

Zureen

Oversleeping/Undersleeping :P

2009-08-08T21:06:00.002+08:00

I just woke up 2 hours ago.

I slept from 4 to 7.

I blame Mauli, Div, Nisha and Kausy.

Char kuey teow and nasi kandar till 5.30am.
Haha. It's an inside joke people.

I've had my first sleepover.

Yea, I know.

How lame!

But mum never let me sleep over at any of my friends houses.
I'm lucky that dad was in a good mood.
Believe me, I was shocked myself when I asked him and he said yes.
I even asked again just in case I heard wrong.

Then I skipped up to my mum and sang "Dad let me!"
Mum just laughed.
I know she still didn't like the fact that I was sleeping in someone else's house but she also knew that I missed my friends like crazy. Not seeing them for a week was like not seeing them in a month.

It's hard.
Coming back home late and not being able to just pass out on the bed.

I used to come home and just sleep for an hour or so.
Now I can't.
I have to do my homework, catch up with the subjects that I'm left behind in and do projects that I never had to do in a government school.

It's hard.
But I'm enjoying it.
I only wish that there were more hours in the day.

But doesn't everybody? :)

Zureen

H1N1

2009-08-08T20:53:00.002+08:00

H1N1.

It's really becoming a reality for me.

I mean, before this I knew it was a pandemic.
I understood but it never happened anywhere near so I didn't bother so much.
I stayed at home most of the time too so what did I have to be scared about?

Now I am worried.

It's real and people have died.
But you know, the people who have died with H1N1 actually have had underlying health problems. So you can't blame H1N1 fully.

At APIIT, people get their temperature checked everyday.
We get stickered to show that we've been checked.

In S.M.K.K.K. someone has already had it.
Most of my friends have been skipping school for a week.

In Bukit Rimau school, a kid is positive.

H1N1.

It's here.

But I hope it's not staying.

Leaaaave!!

We'll be nice to the pigs now :P

Zureen

Viewer Discretion

2009-08-08T14:45:00.003+08:00

To everybody who is reading and has read...and has commented.

X is my kawan. Haha.

Nothing more ok?

Even if I wanted anything to happen (which I don't) it couldn't.

Reason being, I think X is gay. Hahaha..
He's a sweetheart and he acts a bit gay sometimes.

I'm just grateful that he, Daniel and Wei Jern took the time to ask me how I felt about the school and if I'm ok.

Anyway, this is the first time I've entered a school and am able to look the guys in the eye and talk without feeling totally awkward.
I'm not going to ruin that by falling head over heels for somebody.

At least not yet :)

So stop assuming ok?
I appreciate if a guy looks cute.
Doesn't mean I want that guy or want anything to happen.

That is all.

******

To a certain person who's read my blog.

Please get a life.

A real one.

Do you have NOTHING better to do than try and control someone?

Do you think that everyone will bow down and give way to you when you ask for something?

If so far they have then you haven't met me.

You're psychotic.

Erm..

2009-08-04T19:31:00.002+08:00

It was a lonely day.

I felt alone. :'(

Go ahead everyone.

Laugh.

I miss you guys like gila babi. :'(

I miss the familiar faces

I miss the familiar voices.

I miss talking with people in class.

I miss knowing I'll be meeting up with Deeba and Farrah during rehat.

I miss them making me eat.

I miss the Adzmy being annoying, sick and hilarious at the same time.
Kacau-ing everyone in sight (including me -_-')

It's a big culture shock.

You know. I thought some people at school were rude to the teachers.

Compared to these kids. We're TOTALLY respectful.

I miss S.M.K.K.K. and all it's inhabitants. :'(

Tau tak?
The entire day I kept wishing that everyone was there in class.
Doing the bloody awesome experiments I'm sure ya'll would love.
Joking with me.
Buat bodoh takde kerja.
I miss the fact that I hugged at least one person at school almost everyday.
I miss your hugs guys :'(
I miss people calling me over when they see me all alone.

I miss you guys so so so so so so gila babi much.

To hope or not to hope?...

2009-08-03T21:29:00.002+08:00

That is. Hope whether or not people will still like me 2moro?

Hey, this is Azureen you're reading about.

Number 1 worrier of the world. That is to say. My world. :)

*crosses fingers*

People thought I was nice.
Please let them still want to talk to me 2moro.
Let me not embarass myself..

I did a bit today -_-'
Lucky no one noticed.
Or they just kept quiet about it.

In one day.
I've already figured out that everyone is nice.
There are just some who are more into themselves than into being nice.

Oh, I'm known as the confuser :)
The relief teacher for English called me that.
I never realised.
I talk reeeeally fast when I'm unsure.
The teacher imitated me.
X's friends imitated me.

Woah..
Seriously. I go through alot of words. :P

Oh wells.
I was being myself.

Likes to talk.
Got nothing better to do so I kacau teacher.
Kinda like a headless chicken when flustered.

Zureen

New Kids On The Block

2009-08-03T17:44:00.003+08:00

Hey everyone.

My first day sucked. :(

I entered and it was like a ghost town.
I waited ages in the hot stinky office and then I had to change in the uniform room with everyone.
Then, the classroom was actually really hot and people were uber mean.
They looked down on me and people scoffed.
The girls whispered about boldly...

****

KIDDING!

I just wanted to make sure I have your attention :)

If that happened I'd be back in SMKKK in the blink of an eye.
Well maybe not but I'd definitely have called someone and cried my heart out.

It was a good day.
I made a friend right away.
Her name is Rachel. :)

She's uber nice. We met in the uniform office.
It's cool how just smiling at someone makes a whole lotta difference.
Sadly she's in Commerce 1 and I'm in Science 1. But new kids stick together and we ended up having break and lunch together with Shafique :)

We were both really nervous to enter our classes but people were...nice.
Ok, hesitating tone but though first impressions count but I know they don't actually show you the actual personality of a person.
The girl who introduced me to the class was pretty nice and I feel like I've known her before. I think I went to primary school with her before.
In standard 2. USJ 20.

Anyway, after a while I got comfortable with my classmates...
As comfortable as someone like me can be.

I entered late so basically I went straight to break after having a free period since they didn't have assembly. I used it to get to know my classmates more. :)
Had fruits and lemon green tea with Rachel during break. Shafique obviously hung out with us.
Had Physics (teacher was ok).
After that was Add Math and I have to say that the teacher was really good.
She's not like Pn. Ong but her teaching methods are really good.

Then it was lunch.
First we went to the office to grab our student I.D. cards.
It's also like a prepaid card and mum put in money for me and Shafique so we can buy lunch.

Went to the canteen, got our food and started eating.
We totally forgot that my monitor (super nice guy) was supposed to belanja us :D
I call him X. No seriously... X. I can't remember his real name and I heard people calling him Mr. X. So that stuck.
He saw us, sidetracked with his friends and sat down with us.
He said he'd belanja 2moro. Yay! Gosh he's just so nice.
But I don't like talking and eating and he and his friends were talking too much.
I get distracted and can't finish my food.
My food is already spicy and it was hard to concentrate eating and answering questions.

I have to be on constant alert when eating because the danger of having braces is that food can get stuck on them and you might scare people by talking with broccoli stuck all over.
So yea juggling between eating, answering questions and making sure nothing is stuck on my teeth in hard.
In the end I didn't finish my food properly. Haish..

Even through all that, I still sweated. The bloody food was so spicy that my body had to let the steam out.
When I was talking to X, duh he asked why I was sweating. I was like "Spicy food!" and that ended that.
Ya'know. I always think people wouldn't want to talk to me after they see me sweat like a pig but X and his friends kept asking me questions during out relief time in English and it was really nice. They made me feel welcome. :)
Thank God for air-conditioning though.
Though I think something was wrong with it coz it wasn't THAT cold.

The day was good.
Except towards the end when my stomach was in pain due to the spicy food on an empty stomach. Plus then I got a major headache.
Everyone seemed to be getting sick in my school.
Crazy la these people.
But in a way I hope something happens. I honestly don't want to take the monthly test next month. I'll be studying more now which is good.
I don't want to be bottom in class. Pfft. Only 18 in class and you think I want to be last?

I don't think so.
Even though I have an excuse I ain't gonna be the last.
I'm not gonna be known as a dunce.

STUDY!
Zureen

OhMyGosh..

2009-08-02T20:56:00.002+08:00

*bimbo mode*

Like ohmygosh I like totally just realised that like 2moro is gonna be like my first day in that new school. Like the one that people keep thinking I say 'ARMPIT' but like isn't actually anything to do with armpits.
I like am sooo like nervous..

dotdotdot

Oh Gaaawd..
I can't keep that up.
Too much work to be a bimbo in my opinion.
Especially when you don't have crazy-sarcastic friend (Farrah) and crazy-perverted friend (Deeba) around.

I remember when they were still in 4 Science 3 and we were feeling hyper. We decided to be bimbo's and decided water was fattening and eating is a crime against nature and..and... that Paris Hilton invited Deeba for dinner and that was beyoond insulting and horrifying. AHAHA.
BUT! I'd like to know which bimbo talks about microorganisms in the water?
Like helllooo! Too many syllables. Mi-cro-or-ga-ni-sms! That's 6 syllables already!
Why didn't her brain explode? Hmmm...

Speaking about fats and etc.
There was also the time Farrah and Deeba bought Fish Satay (i still think yuck) outside of the school and while they were in the process of eating, Bob a.k.a Yu Jin wagged a finger and said "Calories!". Heehee..
He's funny and I'll miss MY Bob. If you're reading this Bob, yes, you're mine.
Yu Jin can be someone else's. Hahaa.
I don't like people other than me, Mauli and Grace calling him Bob. It's OUR nickname.

Now thinking about Bob reminds me of Ben. The other half of the duo that I used to hang out a lot in form 3. Gosh I miss your sick jokes Ben.
What happened? We're in a different class and you stopped talking to me.
He's still a great guy albeit he's a perv. He called me on my birthday last year :)
I was surprised but really touched. He doesn't know. Shuuussh!
He said goodbye when I went to school to pick up my PEKA. Or his equivalent to a goodbye. Which was "Farrah and Deeba said you wore that shirt to show off your boobs."
Thanks Ben. I'll miss you too. :D

Farrah, Deeba, Alia, Mauli, Ben, Bob, Adzmy and all the other SMKKK'ians that made that difference in my school life. I'm missing everybody already.
I'm gonna treasure the funny as hell, entertaining to the core, crazy as shit times and totally wish I could be around to make more.

I'm gonna take the small life lessons you guys showed me (and yes, hard to believe it, they did teach me stuff even if they don't know it) and rock APIIT. Emily style. Haha.

I love y'all.

I'm nervous as ever to start APIIT 2moro.
But I'm gonna enter with a smile and...try not to puke my breakfast :)

Zureen

Ouch

2009-08-02T10:24:00.002+08:00

Ow ow ow ow ow.

My feet are killing me at this very moment.
Going down the stairs hurt. A lot.

Thank taekwondo for that.

Too much sliding around gave me blisters on the balls of my feet and my toe. :(
Actually they're worst than blisters because it's like the skin stretched and everytime I slide it kinda pinches my foot and it goes deceivingly back to normal when I relax.
Ouch.

Reasons why I didn't join in sparring practice in the vests:
a) My feet were killing me and putting into practice more sliding and etc. would've probably immobilised me :P
b) I don't need to look like a bigger fool than I already do without the vest.
c) Looking like a fool in front of people I dislike intensely is not something I like to do.
d) My feet were killing me!

Mentioned this to dad after he came back home last night. (He brought back 2 huge boxes of apple strudel!)
After giving me the lecture on 'how I should just join golf' instead of all this taekwondo nonsense, he said I should get some taekwondo shoes.
Said that I was just senselessly hurting myself and exposing myself to God knows what by training barefoot.

It's really tempting. Dad said he'd only get me cheap shoes but hey, I won't be senselessly hurting myself. Haha.
But I dunno. I don't really feel like I've earned the right to wear the shoes.
Sounds stupid right? But yea, I don't know if anyone else feels like me but wearing the shoes just shows that you've accomplished something already.

Oh well..

Off to stuff myself with apple strudel :P
Jeremy, I know you wish you were me. Hahaa.

Zureen

Blog Anniversary!

2009-08-01T21:24:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday Bloggie!
:D

My blog is 2 years old!

Do not ask me the exact date of when I started this blog.
I don't know.
I know I started it in August 2007 though.

Now it's August 2009.

This blog has seen me through my most emo phase to my recent more self-assured place in life right now :)

I love you Bloggie.

You never judged.
You never talk back.
You never mind if I don't finish a story.
You remember everything I write.
You're willing to forget everything I delete.

Craving

2009-08-01T18:29:00.002+08:00

I'm craving soo many things to eat right now.

I know why of course.

Do you?

And it ain't pregnancy cravings. Hahah.
Do you think if I was pregnant I'd be here to write on this blog?
Ooooh no. My mum would be skinning me alive at this moment if I were pregnant.

Anyway, I WANT TO EAT!

Nothing is stopping me of course.
Just myself.

I've gained weight.

Grrr..
Just from a few outings with my mum's friends.

Honestly, they are the coolest 'aunties' but the way they meet up EVERYDAY to eat is amazing.
It's not like they eat salads either.
Most of the time it's at the mamak and you know how fat free that is. Haha.
Or it's at Kheng's and they're eating curry me.
Anndd, their snacks! Gosh. Mum makes these sandwich bun thingy's and brings them during the kids swimming lessons and etc.
It doesn't take more than 5 minutes and they already cajoled you into eating with them. Or "Just pick something laa" at the mamak. Haha.

I told them that I can never follow them anywhere ever again. EVER.
Even to go morning jogging which they follow up with an eating session. WTH is that?
But they are amazing company. If eating with them doesn't make you full then talking with them will. There's just always something to discuss.

I regret going out with them but I can't say I didn't enjoy eating :P
Hey, this is the girl who had to eat steamed fish (yum) with steamed broccoli (yeck) for a week ok?

Time to go into my 'zen' mindset again.
*hums*
You will have discipline and control over fooood.

Okay, that should do it.

Going to fix myself Milo. And tell my stomach to shut up.

Kidding. :D

Zureen

Ngeee..

2009-07-31T23:57:00.002+08:00

I feel stressed out.
I wanna let go.
Let's go way out, spaced out,
and losing all control.
:)

This is late, lame and totally random but I still want to write about it because it's MY blog :D

Anyway, went to Sunway on Thursday to look for Mr.Size-13-feet-giant's (Shafique) shoes.

First we went to get Hazeem's customary KFC and while waiting he and dad went to the arcade with out me, mom or Shafique knowing.
When we reached the arcade we saw them playing one of those adventure-story-shooting games. It looked fun but I diam2 only laah..
It felt lame to ask if any of them wanted to play with me.

Then Shafique went off to play the basketball game and Hazeem went and played a game where you aimed and pressed a button trying to kill insects. Go for killing insects! Haha..
So they played a bunch of games and I stood around following Hazeem while mum watched dad and Shafique play basketball together.

Then before we left Shafique wanted to play the shooting game with dad but Hazeem said he wanted to play ith him. Out of nowhere I asked if I could play. The storyline of the game looked really cool. Plus, I know me and Shafique make an awesome team for those kinds of games. :P
Hazeem was a total sweetheart. As soon as he heard me he was like "Ok kakak, you play."
Queue Awwwwww...

So..I played. A boy did we have fun.
The storyline was that these two people are being attacked by animals and insects while on a tour of a jungle.
And honestly, I haven't felt like really close to Shafique like that in a while.
It's so corny and cliche but we were like exactly on the same wavelength and smoothed through the game like it was Tic Tac Toe.

Not gonna give anymore details coz it'll make me sound like the game freak that I am but I'll just say that if Hazeem didn't suddenly want to help me (which I let the sweetheart do), me and Shafique would've probably gotten through the whole game and annoyed the Japanese dude and his kids who were waiting for us to stop playing. Haha.
Heyy, it was our cool-ness that made a few people stop and watch us play ok? Haha.

familyfirst
Zureen

What A Week ;]

2009-07-31T17:02:00.002+08:00

It's been a hectic week.

Well I think so.

Sleeping late and walking up early everyday is what I've been doing.

It is a good thing I stopped school early.

Because omg..

The things we have to look for.
The time we spent in APIIT figuring everything out is soo.. phew.

On Monday alone we went to APIIT to settle everything, buy the books and were shown our classes. We were there for 4 hours? Without breakfast :( Haha.
I'm kinda intimidated by my class but we'll see on Monday when I actually start.
Maybe they're shy? Pfft..
I wish I was a Form 1. They are AMAZINGLY friendly. And funny :)
I hope Shafique can make some good friends. Hoping that for myself too :[

The rest of the week was spent going out to find school stuff like extra stationary and new school shoes. They wear black shoes in APIIT.
My pencil case is seriously under-stocked.
If I were still in SMKKK this wouldn't be much of a worry. There's always a friend willing to lend you something :D

Me and Hazeem have already gotten our shoes. It was super quick.
Went to Mid Valley and entered Bata. Dad was actually looking for Shafique at first because his size 13 feet are difficult to accommodate :P
But after being told that they don't carry size 13, dad turned to me and handed the shoe he was looking at. I tried my size and voila! I found my school shoes. Hazeem was about the same.

Why I love my shoes:
They're black (duh).
They're a cool design (in my opinion).
They don't look bulky like my white school Nike's.
They give me an extra bit of height. :P

Haha. Yea, I'm kinda sensitive about my height.
Why?
Try having a giant for a younger brother and constantly having to hear short jokes. Pfft.

Oh, funny thing. On the way in the shop I saw some black Nike shoes and my mum was "We're not getting you Nike anymore." meaning she didn't really want to get me anymore expensive school shoes. She wanted to get me some black canvas shoes. I didn't mind.
But in the end, dad handed me the black Reebok shoes and they both agreed to it. Hehe..
Away went mom's idea for canvas shoes. :P

I can see you people looking and thinking that I'm some spoilt rich kid. I'm not.
I hardly buy shoes ok? I love them like any other girl but I don't sulk everytime mum says no when I see cool flats or killer heels (which is practically EVERYTIME ok?).

School shoes are a necessity.
Why not buy something that lasts?
I'll be wearing those shoes for 4 years at least. It's because they don't look so much like school shoes that I can wear them out and about.

Anyway, going to APIIT means tons of luxuries are out of the question now.
I don't deny it. My family is well-off. But we're not well-off enough to drop money like it grows on trees.

I don't go out with friends a lot either.
And when I do, in my own way, I'm a scrooge.
When I do go out it's usually because I haven't seen my friends in ages. When I saw ages, I mean ages.
It's not like a few days. It's not even a few weeks.
It's usually at least 4 months. The longest has been a year.

Ok, sorry for the lecture but I know some people have been viewing me as some kind of spoilt rich kid. I'm so fed up with that. Just because you get sent to a private school it doesn't always mean your family is rich.
It just means that your family is ready to sacrifice some things to make sure you have a good education.

Sometimes it's really daunting to have such high hopes and expectations for you.

Zureen

Mi ausencia

2009-07-29T21:15:00.002+08:00

Sorry for not updating.

It's not because nothing interesting has happened to me.
It's not even because I've been lazy. Well maybe a bit. Ha ha.

Lots of interesting things have happened in the past week or so.
It's just that I don't really know how to write about them without getting emotionally excited.
i.e. angry, freaked out, sad.

Plus there are some things I feel I'd rather talk about with some trusted people.
Oh, sometimes I don't write about some things just because I know that some people EXPECT me to write about it and feel all important about themselves.
I don't to give people I dislike any kind of satisfaction :]

I have a really long draft about my last day in school/co-curriculum.
But I don't know if I want to post it.

All I'll say is that it was a very fun day.
More than I asked for for my last official day actually.

It's just the ending of it that was pretty lame.
Some people are beyond pathetic. They can be soo desperate to get a reaction out of someone that they resort to petty remarks.
It doesn't work when someone like me knows that they got bloody beaten up. HAH!
I could've been all whiplash tongue on them but I kept quiet because I knew. They wanted a scene to show me up.

Excuse me.
Been there, done that.

Make a proper move. Come straight out with it instead of waiting for someone else to make a move like the coward you are.
Then you'll see how much of me you DON'T know.
Seriously, confront me. I want to hear it.

Just remember don't try and attack me.
I may not be as pro as you but you remember me saying this right?

'Spill one drop of my blood and I'll spill an ocean of yours.'

Either way. I can take care of myself.
In danger of calling myself a man, I think I've got more balls than you.

i'mnostrangertodanger
Zureen

Facebook

2009-07-29T11:45:00.003+08:00

Facebook disabled my account. :/

What the heck is up with that?

I'm not trying to impersonate anyone.

So was I reported?
By who and for what I'd like to know.

Now I'm too lazy to make a new account.

Should I?

I guess I'll have to.

That's the only place I can get in contact with Emily and Divya properly when they're back in India and China respectively.

I'm visiting one of you at the end of year :)
I hope.

Zureen

Jimbo's Birthday

2009-07-26T20:23:00.004+08:00

Happy Belated Birthday!!
to my baby bro
Hazeem Asmie :)

His actual birthday was on the 23rd but we had his party today since everyone had school.

Didn't write about it because.. I didn't think about it i guess.
Didn't do anything special on his actual birthday anyway.

Not gonna write more because this just feels like one of those experience-to-understand days.
Writing about it would just ruin it.

ilovemybabybro
Zureen

Ooh

2009-07-24T14:28:00.002+08:00

Lookie!
The Henna Ceremony thingy I did with my cousin :)
She was the bride btw.
Don't tell her about this.
She'll kill me for putting this picture up. :D

I love that dress.
And this picture.
It shows me yet doesn't show me.
Make sense?

Zureen

:[

2009-07-22T22:37:00.002+08:00

Going to school tomorrow :[

Don't really want to.

But I have to settle the paperwork and etc.

takutpn.reetha
Zureen

Farrah Emmylya <3

2009-07-21T23:30:00.003+08:00

Farrah Emmylya is one of my best friends.

I love her like crazy because she does and says the weirdest things to freak me out.
Yet I've learnt a lot from her.
Sometimes you annoy me but you make it up by entertaining me more.

I learnt to be more outgoing and slightly crazy.
I've learnt that sometimes being dirty is actually super funny.
And I've learnt that having an honest-to-your-face friend is actually really nice.

I'm not good with consoling my friends because although I can say a million and one words of sympathy, they're never good enough and I'm always afraid that I'll just end up making them feel worse.

Sayang you're the one who said that you'll laugh at me when I find my 'first love'.
I laughed back told you that I'd never act like an idiot over a guy and you assured me I will.
Well, I did find him and acted like an idiot.
And you did laugh.
But I'm glad you did because it just taught me more things.

I know I'm still inexperienced and a total moron when it comes to love with myself.
But I can imagine your feelings right now.
I can imagine the pain and sadness.
Yet I know imagination can never compete with reality.
I know while I imagine, you're feeling it a hundred times worse.

I don't know what else to say dear.

Be strong.

I'll be here for you (our house is 2 minutes away).
And stay positive.

isayangyou
Aween

Anxiety Attack

2009-07-20T15:09:00.002+08:00

I am going to have a nervous breakdown soon if i don't learn to relax.

This moving business is beyond stressful.

The funny thing is that suddenly I'm stressing out more about school assignments.
I'm leaving soon, why should i care?
It's like i feel the responsibility weighing down on me to make a good impression to the teachers before i leave.

But I'm kinda pissed over the fact that my English teacher is looking down on me because of who I'm friends with.
Whatever i guess. Her problem. Not mine. I can still manage to maintain my A grade in English and finish off 40 questions when everyone is still at 10 or 15. What does she have to complain about?

Anyway, was debating on whether I should finish off this week of school or just stop after 2moro.
Farrah convinced me. I guess I'll finish off the week. Only a few more days to go.
But i hate saying goodbye. Especially to teachers when you don't really feel connected. I hate the whole saying goodbye formally thing. It's so fake.

staytrue
Zureen

Howdy

2009-07-19T17:21:00.004+08:00

Today has been uneventful.

Went out for lunch at the club with dad and Shafique.

First time ordering Cantonese Kuey Teow for myself.
Surprisingly for something so gooey and messy to eat, it's very tasty :P

Mum came along with Hazeem later and dad went off to play golf.

Now i'm at home with nothing better to do.

************

Wrote that hours ago :)

Later on, which was also hours ago, which if you looked at it from an hours ago POV is actually later on...

Ok, i just made myself confused.

Anyway, around 6 I went for a walk with Farrah.
Bukit Rimau is getting boring. :/

talktalktalktalk

Came back home and got invited for Kausy's birthday dinner.

We went to Receta Secreta. That's Secret Recipe in Spanish. :)
Sakun paid for the meal.

Thank you!

Yum. :D

We had our meals and chatted a lot. As usual. People I know always seem to have a low tolerance for sugar and get high easily.
In this case it was Mauli and Divya. It must've been the Ice Lemon Tea.
Honestly, I don't understand it this sugar rush thing.

I remember Deeba and Farrah getting high on New Zealand ice cream.

It's funny to remember how me and Ikhwan totally cringed and pretended not to know them. Haha.
We were united to ignore their crazy antics. :D

That was a first. Usually I totally ignore older guys coz you know. I'm shy..Haha. Yelah Aween.

Anyway, I actually managed to talk to him without blushing or tripping over my words. But he was seriously the sweetest guy I ever met. Super polite and very cute. Haha. If you're reading this Ikhwan. Don't get a big-head.
I'm just still very impressed over the fact that he could introduce himself to my mum even though he was super shy and afraid my mum would bite his head off. :P \

My mum's not like that. She was impressed with him too. Unlike someone else. *ahem* Amad *cough* *cough*

Ok, whole other story there..

Where was I?

Oh yea.

Had our meal and then Kausy's cake came.
It was chocolate banana cake! I was silently going "Omg! I haven't eaten this in a year!"
I used to have that for every birthday since I was 5 till I was 13.

Talked more. Sakun shared her Moscow stories.
Mauli and Div became very high.
Me and Kausy chatted companionably while Sakun was left to fend for herself.

Then I left with cake :D

Oh, pray for the guy that becomes Mauli's boyfriend or husband.
He'll need it. :p

imsofull

Zureen

I miss being 5

2009-07-18T21:35:00.003+08:00

Didn't go to taekwondo today :(

I hate missing class actually.

But it's my business on why i don't go.

Don't go pumping Shafique for info. He'll never tell the whole truth. That's my bro :)

Practiced the piano a lot today but i felt like something was missing.

My heart just wasn't in it today.

That doesn't help when I have FIVE songs to perform.

If I can actually master them in time.

I'm trying to master one page of each song every week. But that doesn't really add up to much in my opinion. Not when your partner is ready to sing her heart out and you're still squinting at the music sheet stabbing at the wrong notes. Oh well.

Was invited to OldTown for a birthday lunch for Divya. Nish couldn't make it. It's a good thing actually. She had the chicken pox and is in the peeling stage and I've never had it. :/

I'd like to keep it that way.

Met Sakun. It was really awesome to talk to her. She bought me a scarf from Moscow. :)

She forgot the cute Russian guy i asked for. :( I checked. He wasn't in the bag she brought the scarves in. Hahaha.

She just finished her 1st year in medical school in Russia. The interesting facts about the human body and preserved corpses she told me...Reeeaaally cool. Disgusting. But. Cool.

Walked over to the bike shop when mum called.

Decided not to get 2 separate bikes and just asked mum to get a really good bike me and Shafique can share. It's black and white mountain bike. Superb.

Then guess what. We went back to OldTown because mum wanted a drink. The girls were still there. Mum had a chat with Sakun. She was all "Oh you're so tiny! And so pretty!". She is. But she's taken. And by a very sweet guy btw :)

That's a story to tell. Classic "We met in medical school" story.

chatchatchatchat

Then we went back home, got Hazeem's bike and went to the park to play with his friends.

I love little kids. Obviously the little boys were lost in their own world but i like talking to Aina. She didn't talk much but she is the dreamiest and prettiest 4 year old i know.

The boys stuck in their own world and Aina stuck in hers, me and Shafique decided to hang out together. I haven't played with him in forever. I kinda miss our kid moments.

We ran around like idiots.

Ran along with Aina on her bike.

Almost got run over by Akbar the future rempit. Haha.

Tried out the slide.

Hung on the monkey bars. Shafique pulled me off the monkey bars :/

Played catch.

Swung on the swings.

At one point I asked Shafique to push me higher on the swings.

He did and I had a flashback to when I was 5 and he was 3.

I would be the one pushing him on the swings. Being the good sister I was and because all I knew was to protect my little brother and make him happy. Along with loving my mum and stuff obviously.

I was uber protective of Shafique back then. I still care about him. I just can't care like I used to. I don't know how to handle a hormonal teenage guy. LOL.

So yeah, back to the swings.

Shafique pushed me till I felt like i would almost fly off.

Even though at one point I screaming for him to stop and my fingers were hurting from holding onto the metal chains so tightly.

*rolls eyes* This is the brother I care so much about.

*sigh*

I miss being 5.

Zureen

Bothered

2009-07-17T21:48:00.004+08:00

I'm thinking about making my blog private.

What do you think?

Seems like a good idea I think.

I'll give it more thought.

Friend: Zureen what's the one thing that you have to have in a guy?

Me: Speaks perfect English?

Friend: You're hopeless.

Me: And the guys here are too. At English. *grins*

Friend/Me: *laughs*

Aween

Official

2009-07-17T13:49:00.000+08:00

My secret that i've been 'keeping' is that i'm moving.

Not house by the way.

I'm changing schools.

I am leaving S.M.K. Kota Kemuning and going to APIIT.
Azureen who used to make fun of Aletheia the Private School Girl is going to be one herself.

It's not gonna affect anyone except me actually.

But obviously, since i'm going to another school i won't be seeing my classmates much if at all.
I mean even when i'm in another class i hardly see my friends in other classes so a different school is a whole big thing.

I'll miss them loads.
4 Science 3 is an awesome class.
The chats and boy talk with the girls.
The silly talks and funny antics the guys do.
I just started talking to a few guys properly and then i'm leaving. :(

Oh well.

I can't say i'm too sad.
I'm sad that i'm leaving my friends but i've always wanted this.
I'm just pretty nervous of having to enter a new school.
But it seems they are gonna be a few new form 4 students too in APIIT.

I wish i was starting at the same time as them. They're starting next week.
I'm starting next month. But next week may be my last week at school.

There's lots of stuff to do.
New uniforms, scrounging for textbooks, clearing out anything that belongs to SMKKK and etc.
We're looking for second-hand stuff since it's almost the end of the year and there's no point in getting new stuff.
I have almost everything already. Maulika was nice enough to give me Chakra's old textbooks.

APIIT uses a few different books but i dunno. Maybe the teachers will excuse me if i can't find them. Doubt it though.

prettyexcited
Zureen

Shane Dawson makes me giggle :D

2009-07-16T18:53:00.000+08:00

Okay okay.
One last post.

Since i am such a noob and cannot seem to put on the Embed code thingy here i'll just give you the link to a Shane Dawson vid you must watch.

Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIkGkvpS3FQ&annotation_id=annotation_538195&feature=iv

Seriously, he is so funny.
He kinda reminds me of you Em. :D
Really, the face he makes at 1:25 is soo classic Em.

I have a thing for him. I don't know why.
Maybe coz he reminds me of you Em?
Hahaha...ok no. I'm no lezzie.
I like guys. I mean obviously, i have a thing for Shane. Not for you Em. We are L.E.Z. but let's just leave it at initials ok? :P

Thank you Nadrah (and Shane :D) for lighting up my days and making me laugh like crazy.
Zureen

oops..

2009-07-16T16:07:00.000+08:00

Hi,
Yea, i know i didn't go to school today but it was for a good personal reason.
Tak malas ok Farrah! I had my shower and dressed etc. when suddenly...i'm not telling! Haha.

Anyway, my mum brought me and my brothers out and we went to _ _ _ _ _ to finalise and ask about some stuff and etc.
(the secret shall be unveiled soon!)

Then we went to Subang Parade for lunch.
We ate at Manhattan Fish Market.
Guess what! Hazeem got offered to get his picture taken and put in a magazine by the marketing manager? Cool right?
He didn't want his picture taken though.

Me and Shafique tried to convince him and he got really upset.
We should've told him what mum said. Which was, "You know if you let him take your picture, you would probably have gotten money to buy more toys."
Damn...me and Shafique totally didn't think of that at all.
We tried flattery.. Didn't work.

And then mum came back from doing some stuff and the marketing manager came over. So she asked him, do you want to do it and Hazeem, being very...menopausal, ran out of the restaurant. Mum went after him of course.

So blablablabla.
The guy felt so bad that he asked the staff to cancel our order of Seafood Platter for Two off the bill and we only had to pay for the drinks. Heehee.. :D
That guy shouldn't have really. Hazeem was angry with us. Not him. erk..

It took a while for Hazeem to calm down. Not a very promising start to his would-be marvelous child modeling career. Haha.
Mum convinced him to behave about it if it ever happens again. Which i doubt.

Oh well,
Off to do some add maths and read history! *gasps*
I know! Zureen...doing add maths? On her own? With no one else (or their book) around?! Haha, i do it ok. Well, now anyway. ;P

Shane Dawson ;D
Zureen

Today

2009-07-15T19:24:00.000+08:00

Look at Divya's cute eyes!

Mauli says i look like a cartoon character. :P

She tasted sweet btw. :D

Angels.. Pfft..

Our favourite picture. It's soo retro.

bestfriendsforever

Zureen

12th, International Taekwondo Tournament

2009-07-14T14:54:00.000+08:00

Yea, i did lotsa stuff on Sunday.
Well not really, but my day was filled.

While waiting for my name to be called during the CPR exam, Hafizah told me that there was an international taekwondo tournament going on in Stadium Malawati.

Now obviously, i want to see more sparring matches but add in 'international' and i'm all ears. Hahah.
So after finishing the exam i quickly called my mum and asked if Farrah, Amalia and me could go watch the tournament and for a ride since *sigh* none of us can drive.
She said yes.

She picked us up and we had lunch in Tesco.
It was Farrah's first time there.
Not that i blame her dad for never going there.

That place is very racist. If your face isn't Malay enough don't expect anyone to take notice of you.
My mum was looking at some phones and asking the price and that idiotic Malay salesman gave her a sideways glance and went back to serving the Malay family in front of him.
I was very close to shouting at him. Mum stopped me. :/
Don't think i wouldn't. I've yelled swear words at a lady is Carrefour for trying to belittle my mum. The look on her face was priceless when i called her a bitch. :)

Anyway,
munchmunchmunch and mum sent us to the stadium.
Got there and as soon as we entered me and Amalia's jaws dropped. Farrah's didn't because she doesn't like mat salleh..oh, and she's loyal to her boyfriend.

The reason for the dropped jaws is as soon as we entered the stadium a really hot Australian competitor walked past us.
Now we aren't the kinda of lame Asians who's eyes get huge and round everytime a foreigner walks by coz, if there is nothing to look at, there's nothing to look at.
But Amalia turned to me and said "Thank you Aween." because really, it was like hot athlete heaven. Ahaha.. She was saying why did her sister stop taekwondo coz then she would probably be competing in these kinds of competitions and Amalia could've been introduced to alot of people.

Now anyway, we went around the stadium alot because we wanted to look at all the teams. We saw Singapore, Thailand, Japan, Australia (2 teams), Malaysia, Sri Lanka and i think we saw a Nigerian. Didn't catch any match except for Australian and Malaysian matches.
We also had a 'competition' to see who could get the most smiles.

Because i am shorter than the two beauties and have braces i was obviously out of the running. Meaning i did not get any smiles because the tall people didn't look far down. They saw Amalia and Farrah and ooooooh...
I hate you guys. Hhahah..

No ok. I'm not that lame.
I don't really mind. Takpe. Nanti i dapat bf dari Perancis ke ape...Haha. Yea right. Don't be lame Zureen (-_-')

Oh, we were in our First Aid clothes still and all these guys kept making lame jokes (trying to get out attention) like "Oh sakit perut." and etc. There was this guy who started limping in front of us and shouting that his leg was in pain. Liars and losers all of them. But it was entertaining.

After a while we got bored and went to Petronas. Farrah wanted to go to Giant but i didn't really feel like it.
I was joking about what if as soon as we left then someone needed our help in the stadium.
Then on the way back. As we were nearing the stadium we heard ambulance sirens. Omg. Imagine my horror. Ruzana called and said that someone had a fit or a stroke or something.

Later on we found out that it was actually a heart attack and a Malaysian athlete's father.
He was pronounced dead at the hospital.
We had a minute of silence.

This was after all the matches were over.
The Malaysian won gold by the way. His opponent was an Australian. It was an amazing match.

During one match a Malaysian supporter kept yelling "Malaysia Boleh! Malaysia Boleh!".
That was cool but i don't know why when he suddenly said "Malaysia Can! Malaysia Can!" i burst out laughing. My laughter was pretty loud and i had to stifle it in Farrah's shirt. :D
Maybe it was the literal translation thing that is pretty hilarious with Malaysian English.

Then there was one match where the guy got kicked in the nuts..Ahahaha..
I know you guys are probably wincing in pain (the athlete did) but it looked hilarious from up in the stands.
The Malaysian supporter started saying really loudly "Eh! Don't play ball lah!".
We were all laughing.

Sorry for the bloody long story and no pics.
It would be longer but i'll spare you the boredom.
We didn't bring a camera.
Farrah's died during the CPR exam.

Zureen

11th and 12th, CPR

2009-07-13T19:38:00.000+08:00

I spent the weekend at school.

Noo, i'm not a nerd.
But what's wrong with nerds anyway, huh?
I'll have you know...ok, off the topic already :P

I had a first aid course and exam.

On Saturday we revised whatever we learnt.
Like how to bandage a broken arm and what kind of knot we should use.
We also did CPR on a dummy. It was fun, but very annoying coz i think the dummy was broken or something. No matter how much you tilted the head, pinched the nose or sealed your lips to the dummy's mouth, the chest would not rise.
I think i did it correct anyway because the guy who came to help refresh our memories didn't comment.
Oh, and i answered his question correctly and he had a look of surprise on his face.
I think coz i was really nervous and he expected me to fumble.
The question was "When do you start CPR?"
You'd think that it was very basic right? It is. But people get it wrong anyway coz they'll say "When the person is unconscious." but the answer is "When the person is unconscious and is not breathing."

Afterwards for the few of us who stayed on, he gave soalan bocor. Haha.
Thank you anyway. He was a very scary instructor but in the end he was pretty fun. :)

Then on Sunday we had our first aid exam.
The person who taught us all those weeks back came. His name was Silas. But somehow or rather i keep thinking of him as Sir Silas. I think people were calling him sir.
He's really nice and very fun to learn from. Of course, he did show us pictures of amputated limbs and stuff on our first day :/

Anyway, we had the paper exam first.
In my opinion, this was the most nerve wracking part. I didn't study at all the day before and felt unprepared compared to everyone else. Thank God for the extra hour of reading in the hall.
I don't know how i did on it because he never told us our marks.

Then, me, Amalia and Farrah went to 7-E for our 'breakfast'. Haha.
Eating Maggi is such a nutritious way to start the day. :P
We ate while waiting for our turn in the hall for the practical part of the test.

This involved doing CPR on a dummy (a mannequin, not a dumb person :P) and Silas would ask us questions after completing a cycle or two (2 breaths, 30 compression=1 cycle).
I did alright. He corrected me on where to place the palm of my hand but other than that i got on with it alright.
The question he asked me was "When do you stop CPR?". Can you see? First it was when do i start, then it was, when do i stop.
Ticking it off with my fingers i answered:

"When the ambulance arrives. When the patient regains consciousness or starts coughing. When someone else is going to take over and when you are too tired and no one else is around."

Smart right? :D

Then while waiting, me, Farrah, Amalia and Jean sat down at the school entrance thing and started to chatchatchat and listened to MJ songs.
Suddenly, Farrah and I decided to dance like the Thriller music video.
Seriously, we had fun. Jean recorded us and it was hilarious to watch ourselves.

Some guys who passed by were too embarrassed to look at us.
I guess we were pretty embarrassing. :P

Then, Amalia and Farrah started to...urm...violate Jean. Ahahaha!
Some form 1 boys passed by and look slight embarrassed and horrified. I pity them. :P

We were having so much fun we didn't realise how quiet everything was and that everyone had gathered inside the hall.
Guess what?!
Our whole batch passed!

We are now certified first aiders! :)

I like the feeling of being useful.
Useful ok? Not used...

i'll lock lips with you anytime ;P
Zureen

Dear Mr. Right,

2009-07-12T22:42:00.000+08:00

I know you're out there somewhere.
Maybe we've met, maybe we haven't but when we realise it I'm sure it'll be amazing.
I hope you know that I'll always try my best to be Ms. Perfect but I'm only human and sometimes i just need you to be my Superman. You know, the strong and silent type. Just hold me tight when I'm overcome with tears and assure me everything will be alright when I'm really upset.
You know I'll always be true and darling, i expect nothing less from you. Of course, there are always better looking people but at the end of the day you're my one and only.

I don't need expensive gifts or luxurious outings.
Just make me laugh even if I'm already in stitches and tell me I'm amazing. Even if you know that i won't believe you. :)
The little things that make you who you are, are the things that will make me fall in love with you even more every single day you know?

And dear,
I hope we won't fight a lot.
I know we can't be perfect but let's just talk first ok?
I hope you'll be the cool head to my sometimes fiery temper.
Don't hold me back from doing the things i want to do.
If you're worried about something, talk to me.
I'll try and look at it from your point of view.

Last but not least,
I hope you can accept me for the person i am.
The most contradictory, volatile, enigmatic girl in the world.

I know I'm asking quite a bit but if you can try and understand and accept me for who i am, I'll try my best to understand and accept you for who you are.

Wherever you are,
Iloveyou.
Zureen

it's painful you know?

2009-07-12T22:12:00.000+08:00

I feel so gila overwhelmed at this moment.

I'm so stressed.

Everything that happened today just seems too much to bear.

I feel like swallowing some pills and drifting off to eternal sleep.
That way, nothing can bother me right?

Icriedjustnow.
:(

I wish stuff would just get confirmed so aku ndak payah fikir2 lagi.
I wish/hope aku dapat pindah.

I wish i wasn't such a nerd yang ndak faham lelaki.
I wish i wasn't such an emotional freak.
I wish i never met you.
I wish i never said i love you.
I wish that i didn't try anything and stayed feeble Zurin.

I wish i never meant anything i said.
But i meant every single word and that's the saddest part.

But, i know, we're too different.
I tried to beat the stupid stereotype but i was the one to break down and agree with it.

I just know.
If i kept going on, memang i'll have tons of paranoid and jealous moments. Probably memang kita gaduh kan?
I know, i would probably also have those seventh heaven moments too but i know, that i hate those kinds of relationships.
I don't want a teenage relationship where the guy and girl after a while, every few months "Okay, i want to break up." and then, they get back together. Sakit kepala aku saja.

So i guess i'll wait yea?
Like i always say,
I want to make sure it's Mr.Right and not Mr.Right-Now.

My mum is my saviour.
She said to me "You're a late bloomer. But in the end, girls like you get the best."
You guys may not think that's much but to me it's like the light at the end of the tunnel.

That's exactly how i feel at the moment.
I feel like i'm stumbling along a dark winding tunnel with only hope to keep me going forward.

ihatebeingalone
Zurich

Awww

2009-07-10T17:53:00.000+08:00

Cute right?

Sabahan humour: Dia cute, aku biut. :P

My baby bro is a sweetheart sometimes.
I know my editing sucks but i just had to try something.
This was the picture that called to me.

Oh, and if anyone steals this picture and somehow makes it offensive or calls it their own, i will tear you limb from limb.

Other than that, enjoy :D

Aween

Finally..

2009-07-10T17:15:00.000+08:00

It's finally sunk in about my going...

I know right?

How long does it take for something like this to sink in?

Quite a while if you understand what i've been through.

It sunk in when mum was asking me if i knew where we could get second-hand textbooks.
(it's almost the end of the year, why would i need new textbooks?)

I was racking my brains and then i remembered that i have friends who have older brothers :)

Though, i won't ask the older brothers. I'll ask the older brother's friends :P

Confusing no?

I'm going to ask my friend's older brother's friend :D

Hahaha...

I hope they have them still.
And i hope they're nice enough to give them to me.

i'llbeyourverybestfriend
Zurich

Goodbye

2009-07-10T12:52:00.000+08:00

I've told almost everyone that I'm leaving next month.
I haven't told a few coz I'm afraid of the way they'll react.
Plus, i have a feeling that they'll be rather jealous in a bad way and start talking about me behind my back. What kind of friends are those yeah?

I know people were joking but you know, no one says anything that they don't slightly mean.
You don't have to say "Wow, it's so awesome you're going there. Good luck!"
But i just hear "I hate you. Why not use that money to go to college? Wah! So rich wan. Useless only go to that school" and etc..
It stings.
It's hard enough to know that your new school might be filled with snobs and no one might want to be your friend but it's harder when you feel like your friends don't really care that you're moving.

The fact is, when you've been at 1 school for a long time, you know the inner workings.
You know how far you can push the limits of everything and anything.
That's the way i feel anyway.

I used to be the new kid almost every year till standard 5.

Then, when i had to 'settle' down at SMKKK, i couldn't wait to get out and leave.

Now, I'm kinda sad to leave.
As much as i got hurt, the bitter memories and etc. There were tons of amazing memories that happened.
They're not even the huge events in school.

These memories are the times my friends would make a dirty joke knowing I'd go "Ewww".
The cheeky things the guys would say in class to lighten up the mood.
The times that a teacher didn't come and we could all gossip like crazy.
The 'rajin' class moments like when we had to do our PEKA.
The feeling of being united as a class when the teachers pick on us.
The cheekiness, the sarcasm, the jokes, the laughter, the tears.

I'll miss all that and more.

So now, I'm making the most of it and i want to make some more lasting memories with my friends with what little time i have left with them.

Me and Farah have decided to ignore idiots and do our stuff together :D
For us and not to impress anyone.

2moro there's the First Aid revisory thing.
I'll have 'fun' seeing gruesome pictures with Farrah and Amalia.

I won't be gone till the 31st and I'm bringing a pie :)
Aween

Hiya

2009-07-09T18:29:00.000+08:00

This whole thing seems pretty confirmed.

But i refuse to feel excited too much now.

I've been disappointed a dozen times about this thing and i keep wating to hear "Haha, ok. We were just joking. It's not gonna happen."

I'm trying to feel indifferent about it.

I still have to be all hushhush about it.

I want my jambu water :(
Aween

exciting stuff :D

2009-07-08T17:17:00.000+08:00

It was a pretty exciting day today. :)

I have exciting news.
It's wonderful.
It's breathtaking.
It's unbelievable.

I'm shell-shocked.
I'm ecstatic.
I'm so over-joyed that it has paralysed me. :D

But,
I can't say anything right now.
Nothing is confirmed.

"We have to be sneaky Charlie."
"Sneaky."
"Sneeeaaky."

Charlie the Unicorn
Episode 3

Anyway,
Moving on.

Have you seen the pictures of the Harry Potter cast recently?

I remember now why i fell in love with Draco Malfoy a.k.a. Tom Felton. :P

By the way, for those who don't know, Tom Felton is the blonde one. :)

The picture quality here is lame.
I can't seem to put the link. Hmm..
Nevermind, you guys don't have to realise how good-looking he is.
He's mine. LOL.

xoxoxo
Zureen

On A High

2009-07-07T22:45:00.000+08:00

I just came back from piano class and i am so excited.
I am on a high.
Honestly, i almost decided to stop classes for a while after my exam because i lost my passion but learning with teacher Victor has reignited that passion.
It's the fact that he's playing for me songs that are really beautiful. He's also teaching me to be a performer and showing me how to be confident with what i do and play.

It's also the fact that when he says you're good, you know he's not lying or saying it to be nice. In other words, he doesn't bullshit. :P
I played my adored Richard Clayderman song for him and he said i played beautifully. Bangga! Haha. But really, after i finished playing he said to Maulika "You asked me how do you play confidently. This is how you play confidently."
He said that it was so obvious that i loved that song. Even though it's his "enemy's" song. :P
I have not gotten fed up of that song yet. Been playing it at least 20 times a day. There's always something more i feel that i can make better.

Now it looks like I'm playing 3 songs for the end-of-year concert.

1. Hit the Road Jack
It's a jazz song and i won't be in the spotlight. Pfft. Haha. I'm the accompanist. The spotlight will be on this girl Puteri who will be singing.
(she has an amazing voice *jealous* lol )
We did some changes and decided to change the name Jack to Cat and woman to man. If you heard the song, you'll understand why. We'll have to wear matching black outfits it seems. Like the Blues Brothers or something...
Cool right? :D

2. Sunrise, Sunset
This is a solo piece which is nice and because I'm so pumped, it looks easy. I don't think I'll be saying that 2moro though. :)

3. The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy
This is a duet I'll be playing with Maulika. She almost begged teacher to have a song with me. It's a lovely song and i think rather appropriate because the concert is in December.
We haven't decided who will be playing Secondo and Primo.

I am actually really excited to play even though i have never performed and this will be a pretty big show. Lots of guests from outside will be coming and this important person. We have to show that although we may not be a top-notch music center but we can perform as well as this VIP's students.

I'm just really glad that i have 6 months to prepare. Phew..

I'm going to fall asleep smiling tonight :D
Zurich

Smiled Through The Tears

2009-07-07T14:39:00.000+08:00

School started out ok.
Suddenly En.Azmi called out all the form 4 classes for God knows what.

I still don't know because i couldn't hear him and i was preoccupied with my throat which btw, is killing me!
Wanna know something a bit weird and stupid?
Last night before i fell asleep properly, my throat was hurting so much that i mumbled to myself "I think I'm going to die." and then fell asleep. Haha, i told Jer that and he gave me a funny look.

During P.E. i got hit on the face/nose by a basketball.
My eyes watered up and everyone looked really worried but i smiled through the tears. (Look at post title)

History, more fun. I'm being serious here ok. It's not sarcasm.
Amirul is handsome!? ohemgee... haha

English was ok up to a point.
I had to present the theme and moral values for 'Looking For A Rain God' and i don't know whether it was coz Jer kept (lamely) cheering me or that i presented really well but the whole class applauded for me. :) Yea, OK. Big head big head. Haha.
Then Pn.Norrita picked on me coz obviously, Jer was sitting next to me and chatting away like no 2moro. Sometimes it sucks sitting right in front. Teachers notice everything you do.

Mod Math i couldn't concentrate coz my throat was acting up and i zoned out for a bit. Trying yet failing to do any work. Instead, i tried (i don't know if i succeeded) to convince Jer that he needed to pay attention and do schoolwork and etc.
Ok, i think i failed that one. :(

B.M. had a relief teacher for two periods. Yea! Snoozed for a moment and then decided to do my History notes. Then chatted to Farah and Rafizah. Adzmy and Jer were doing stupid things with the feather duster.
Me, Farah and Rafizah talked about how our perfect wedding proposal's would be. :D
Farah's involved a tropical island and mine involved a hotel lobby. :)

Add Math. I am so motivated now. I will ace my Add Math! Or at least pass it...haha

Guten Tag
Zurich

So True

2009-07-06T20:46:00.000+08:00

Took a quiz on Facebook.

Look what it says.

You hide your emotion sometimes.

You tend to be the quiet type or in contrast, you are not happy but sometimes you act it out in order for you to not burden your friends with your problems.

You've faced some problems in your life.
(if only you knew)

Your heart has been dealt blows before.
(too many to count)

You tend to think about things a lot more than other people, and you may get annoyed with people who act out without thinking about consequences.

You are also the type of person that others often come to with their problems because you've been through plenty, and you are very understanding.

Though you sometimes feel lonely, your demeanor is usually chill, and relaxed.

You usually are logical, and rely a lot on facts and information on decisions.
(i need the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth)

You often keep things to yourself.

This is just one side of you, and you have different faces in different situations and environments, just like the moon has phases.

Honestly, that was pretty accurate.
It's interesting how a quiz can sum me up so quick when i've had to struggle to describe myself so many times.
I should print that out and hand it out to anybody who asks me to describe myself. :D

you can give without loving but you can never love without giving
Aween

Bonjour

2009-07-06T18:39:00.000+08:00

Let's try to sum up school really fast.

Surin was being an ass again, trying to make me feel guilty due to the fact that i won't let him sit next to me in class.
En.Suresh was being very annoying a condescending while we were doing our Bio experiments. He was very unfair and made me really angry. I'm pretty sure he could hear me cursing him. I really didn't try to hide the fact that i felt like shouting at him.

History was fun. I know! Amazing right? haha.
I felt sorry for Ban Y.S.. First, teacher totally ignored him after questioning me. Which we btw, totally laughed about. Then, she gave him a hard time about Abu Bakar al-Siddiq's 'princess', Asma'.
But not as hard as Adzmy who had to memorise all 10 facts and kept repeating them over and over and over again. Which again, me and Ban Y.S. laughed about. A lot. Hahaha, sorry Adzmy.

Blablablabla

Went to Plaza Masalam for lunch after school with mum, dad and Hazeem.

Farrah, you were right. The Hainanese Fried Rice tasted good :)

Oh, you knooow, when i went to pay the ticket at the auto-pay machine there was a reaaally good-looking....okok, handsome guy waiting behind me. He looked Italian but on closer inspection, he looked kinda Arab. He would be what my mum calls, refined. *swoon* hahah

He is number 2 on my list of drop-dead gorgeous foreigners. :P
Btw, i totally made that list up. There is no list. But i should make one :D
Number 1 was when we sent Divya's mum to a convention.
Believe me girls, when i say drop-dead gorgeous. I mean drop-dead gorgeous. ;)

Anyway, i'm so exhausted.
Plus, i feel another sore throat coming. It itches and it's painful.
What is wrong with me?! I've been on and off the flu. Grrr...

It doesn't help that my muscles are still kinda spasming from the taekwondo class.
I don't know why my back hurts though. Oh yea. Been practicing the bridge. Grace will be so proud.

Auf Wiedersehen
Zurich

late night chat :)

2009-07-05T11:35:00.000+08:00

I regret not going to taekwondo for a month.
But what could i do? Stuff kept me busy. It was only last week's class that i didn't go on purpose.

Omg, my muscles are aching.

I know somebody reading this is probably going 'padan muka'. :P

Anyway, like i promised Nabeel, i shall put up a snippet of our convo from msn here :)
You probably thought i wouldn't do it. Riiight?
Presenting me and Nabeel. :D

i hate guys sometimes

why? :(

they can eat and eat and eat and not get fat easily
i hate ur metabolism
:(
lol

ahahaha
hey
at least u dnt have to live with balls

OMG
ewwwwww.
but

true

seriously!
it's a friggin burden

Now i'd like to know. What guy says that?
If it's all of you.....OMG.

you'refunny
Zurich

blue belt? :]

2009-07-04T23:54:00.000+08:00

Ya'know ya'know ya'knooow?

I had a nice day today.

I'm totally exhausted but i feel ok.

My grading was good. Except for the fact that i muttered 'fck' alot under my breath for doing a few mistakes. It's not going to kill me though. And hopefully not my chances of getting my blue belt.

I hope he's not reading this
buuut...

I really hate the examiner.
No offence but honestly!
The way he looked at a lot of groups and especially ours.
Like we were painful to watch. Whatever!

Anyways, all in all, taekwondo was ok.
It was just a bit awkward since that guy was there but i learnt to swing my head in another direction and hang out with the Chinese lasses instead of the usual people.
He is a wimp and would never approach me around people he doesn't know.
Heck, he never approached me around people he does know.

I don't like wimpy guys who lie through their teeth.
At least be brave enough to talk to the person you supposedly like.

Ahh, who cares.
There are a million and one fish out there.
But, the thing is, i don't like fishing :)

Hiya Nabeel!
Zurich

p.s. i wrote most of the post in blue in hopes of my blue belt

How Lucky...

2009-07-03T18:09:00.000+08:00

I'm bloody nervous.

My taekwondo exam is 2moro and voila! Obviously, i'm not ready.
To top it off, that person will be there and again, obviously, i feel very uncomfortable with him around.
Please God, give me the strength to get through the exam and pass.
Then, you can break my leg or strike me with high fever for 5 days. I don't mind. Please.

Nerves go away.
Taeguk please don't stray.

Farrah if you're reading this. HELP!

ihateguilt
Zurich

tata thursday

2009-07-02T15:59:00.000+08:00

Good news! (There's also bad news)

I FOUND MY PHONE!

To be more exact, my mum found it. I gave up ages ago.

It was a blessing in disguise, losing my phone.
And you people who would probably go into a coma if you lost your phones are probably shaking your head. Pfft.
I can live without the hand phone. It made it hard to plan stuff but i could live without it.
I prefer human interaction and music. Now if i lost my IpodTouch, THEN i would go comatose.

Now the bad news. My dad barred my phone.
Heh.. He didn't know my phone was lost and when he heard that it had been lost for quite a while, he decided to bar the number. Haish.
It seems, not an hour later, my mum found my phone. What is this?! The cosmos trying to tell me something?

So, all you people who have been finding it hard to contact me, who were probably cheering just now... Y'all will have to wait another a few days or so to be able to contact me.
Don't hurt me!

Anyway, school was ok.
Today i semangat buat add math and mod math sendiri. :)
I have to finish off the add math work today. I didn't do quite a bit. So, i think i wont go out and just stay home and finish everything.
I'm the person who collects the books and send it to teacher at the end of the week, yet i'm also the one who frequently doesn't do her work or send the workbook on time. What is this right?

ivaluemyfreedom

Zurich

Weekend Wednesday :p

2009-07-01T23:21:00.000+08:00

I just read Farrah's blog.
I love you too.
And, awww, you don't want to see me cry.

I know why lah..
I look horrible when i cry! LOL!
I can just hear you say "Ngok la Aween ni."

Anyway, went out with Divya and the gang today.
Watched 17 Again. Movie was awesome and hilarious. And no, it wasn't the fact that Zac Efron was in it. It was just a really good movie.
Met Kak Myira (is that the right spelling?). She was sitting right behind me.
She's funny. We were watching a movie trailor about (another) end of the world movie and she was like "Takut tak? Bagus sembahyang banyak banyak.". Ok, doesn't look funny but i realise that she's an over-the-top kind of person and that's really cool. I'm pretty boring in comparison. :/
I think she was on a date. The guy must have been a bit blur? We were chatting before the movie and i kinda didn't acknowledge that he was there. Heh. Sorry.

Tried dresses in Nichii and etc.

Saw a hot foreigner that made Mauli's jaw drop. Literally!

Then came home.

Pris invited me to her house.
I love talking to her.
We don't talk to each other alot but honestly, i feel like we needed more than 2 hours to really talk to each other.
Plus picking her brain and asking her opinion on stuff is amazing. I don't know. She's the kind of person i would love to meet all the time because they always have something new to teach you even if they don't mean to.

Now i'm back.
Wow, i noticed i can sum up a pretty long day quickly but when it comes to a lame day at school, i have tons to say. Weeeiirrd.
Maybe the events that happen in a lame day at school is more interesting than a long day out? Hmmm...

Buenos Noches
Zurich

chatterbox chick

Bonjour! Comment allez vous?

I usually won't do this but..

Hide yo' kids cuz she iz back :)

NOT MINE! Whoopee!

Kenduri and a whole lotta laughs :D

Me and my cousin (Don't be jealous)

Married in 10 years?! *horrified*

Día Nueve.

Hola amiga!

Uncertainty

A Change of Perspective.

*Insane Laugh*

Epiphany

Eye Bags

Silence Is Truly Golden.

I am ACTUALLY back :)

I know you missed me

I'm gonna try harder

*cough cough* *hug* :)

Sorry Blog :/

SANDWICH!!!! :D

December 14th

Hey Y'all

Achtung Achtung!

Smile When You Don't Want To

Aye

I love you Mum :')

Je'Taime Yo!

Take That!

Sorry for being emo!

Philosophy

I hate Patrick :P slash Mutant Zombie Mannequin Robots!

Coz I'm TNT!

Screw Me. Ugh.

Kay-Gee!

;'(

Science Fair

I'm late.. Again

Oi vei

Just Drink It

When you're up, you gotta come down. Way down.

I think I'm falling for you :)

I'm back like the Backstreet Boys :P

9th Day of Puasa

Open Sesame

Hey Stranger :)

Pictures Galore! (no thanks to Facebook)

Pictures For You!

Mauli's Getting Old!

Up :)

Piccies :)

No Pictures :(

Home

I'm Baaack

Oversleeping/Undersleeping :P

H1N1

Viewer Discretion

Erm..

To hope or not to hope?...

New Kids On The Block

OhMyGosh..

Ouch

Blog Anniversary!

Craving

Ngeee..

What A Week ;]

Mi ausencia

Facebook

Jimbo's Birthday

Ooh

:[

Farrah Emmylya <3

Anxiety Attack

Howdy

I miss being 5

Bothered

Official

Shane Dawson makes me giggle :D

oops..

Married in 10 years?! horrified

Insane Laugh

cough cough hug :)