Bonjour! Comment allez vous?

So here I am again.

I've rather missed blogging. I write in a journal now. But not that often & sometimes I feel silly because you wonder "What would this look like when I look back on this?".

But you know what? I have just looked back on my old blog posts and I realize how amazing and lucky I was to be able to express my feelings and thoughts of those moments in my life. Seriously, it brought tears to my eyes.

I've been feeling sort of down lately. And I've been beating the feeling back but it's a hard battle within myself. But looking back on these posts and some of my chatbox comments, I realize how lucky I've been.
I've realized that there are/were people who care and I've recalled the happy times. But all this nostalgia is a little bit scary because it's putting me back in a vulnerable place.

Anyway, how much time has past! There was that one post about being honoured to have Chef Jochern as my Head of School & now HE IS! So yes I've started college.
And then there was that post about going back to Sabah to do my license which never happened btw. And the posts while I was in Sabah which seem so long ago even though it was only less than half a year ago.

This place really is for posterity. I hope I can keep adding to it :)

Yours truly,
Azureen

I usually won't do this but..

OMG. I IZ SO BORED.

i have NOTHING to do.

Well, I could clean my study table?

I could continue to read I Capture the Castle?

I could go jogging? Pffft..

Come on la. Let's go do something instead of rotting in front of this computer.

Let's see how much I can accomplish today.

Hide yo' kids cuz she iz back :)

What an awesome title no?

So I got back on Sunday and yes I'm only blogging now because...I want to?

Anyway, there is too much to tell so if you want to know EVERYTHING and not be able to get a word in edgeways then I suggest meeting me.

However, I'm planning on making a Vlog so if I ever do make and post one, you can just watch my awesome-ness there.

Yes, I'm rather refreshed from my holiday and I'm just as full of myself as ever.

Not really, I feel like I look like crap which I probably do but honestly? Who has time to care? I have much better things to do than worry what other people think I look like.

But what helps me get through the day is this mantra I like to say.

I don't just say it to myself, I say it everywhere and to almost everyone.

If you can guess what it is. Kudos. You know me pretty well. No you do not get a prize.

If not, meh, whatever. You haven't been exposed to my brilliance enough. AHAHA.

One of my closest friends Em, unwittingly thought me to have a mantra during one low point in my life and subconsciously I must of retained it. And here we are today. A more awesome me!

Seriously, I don't think I'm that great but I don't want to beat myself up over every little mistake I do or flaw I have. So get over yourself. I did. Almost.

Gute Nacht.

There's not a lot of things I can't say right now.

I feel a bit unsafe. But not for reasons that are physically threatening.

I've been listening to Maher Zain a lot recently.

Honestly, his music makes me feel calm and relaxed.

It's such a nice change compared to the "Oh my boyfriend left me, Oh I got together with a guy, Oh I think he's perfect, Oh you don't know what you're missing" that's so prevalent in music recently. And yes I'm talking about that singer. Hahaha.

Okay, it's not just her but you know, those songs about getting the guy, losing the guy, 'everlasting' love, ended love..blablabla. Why not listen to something that is...I don't know how to explain it. It's too hard.

I'm not saying that I'm not into pop culture. I like dance music and music that makes you happy but I will never understand people who purposely listen to sad songs about love all the time. Lain lah if you're listening about struggling through obstacles and overcoming them or something like that. But if it's about some stupid dude leaving you or something like "Cintamu *insert word here*", then screw that man. I have better things to do than be sad and melancholic over THAT.

Anyway, I don't know why I'm rambling again.

Oh yea, it's my blog. I can write on here and not give a monkey's arse whether someone laughs at me or not. Because when I try to talk to some people about these kinds of things most of the time they laugh. And it's not even because they think it's a silly idea. It's because they're too dim to get it. HAHA.

Oh that reminds me of something my mum told me about recently.

Oh I love her :)

NOT MINE! Whoopee!

You're not meant to be bub.

And I am finally assured, I made the most perfect decision ever.

HAH! *in your face*