Yea..Im frustrated!
People are calling me something i don't even think i can pull off. EMO? For god sakes man! or girl! Ok..so what? So what if sometimes im quiet? Moody? A bit pissed off? I have my reasons. Wanna know what the reason is most of the time? I feel left out! I feel neglected.
Yes. Me. Cheerful, laughs and makes jokes at almost everything Azureen.
The jokes? They're my shield. With jokes i feel like people actually listen. Sometimes i don't have the strength anymore to even joke to make me happy. THATS why.
I don't tell anyone, especially my friends why i act that way. They wouldnt understand. Actually i wouldnt know. I dont want them to get hurt. And to listen to endless reasons on why they wouldnt do that and the thought of them getting hurt..Well.. Its too much.
Its stupid right now. I really like the emo ppl i meet. I used to crave to be able to be like them. Now i just wish ppl would shut up. I dont need to be reminded that i get moody at times. I dont need to be reminded on how lonely it gets. Loneliness almost killed me. But fighting now doesnt seem worth it.
And you. I truly like you. I wish you would get that. Understand why i act the way i do. Understand that i wont ever make the first move. Understand that im too weak. Im so frustrated that i didnt take my chance. Acted nice instead of awkward. Why was i so STUPID??
Love is too strong a word. I keep telling myself that the people i met before. They were never real. I dont know now. Fantasy becomes my reality and reality becomes blurred.
Im rather happy with you too.. You came. For me? That's sweet. Awesome. Im sorry. Maybe one day i can whisper to myself at least. The three words i've used so stupidly before.
I...Love...You...
People are calling me something i don't even think i can pull off. EMO? For god sakes man! or girl! Ok..so what? So what if sometimes im quiet? Moody? A bit pissed off? I have my reasons. Wanna know what the reason is most of the time? I feel left out! I feel neglected.
Yes. Me. Cheerful, laughs and makes jokes at almost everything Azureen.
The jokes? They're my shield. With jokes i feel like people actually listen. Sometimes i don't have the strength anymore to even joke to make me happy. THATS why.
I don't tell anyone, especially my friends why i act that way. They wouldnt understand. Actually i wouldnt know. I dont want them to get hurt. And to listen to endless reasons on why they wouldnt do that and the thought of them getting hurt..Well.. Its too much.
Its stupid right now. I really like the emo ppl i meet. I used to crave to be able to be like them. Now i just wish ppl would shut up. I dont need to be reminded that i get moody at times. I dont need to be reminded on how lonely it gets. Loneliness almost killed me. But fighting now doesnt seem worth it.
And you. I truly like you. I wish you would get that. Understand why i act the way i do. Understand that i wont ever make the first move. Understand that im too weak. Im so frustrated that i didnt take my chance. Acted nice instead of awkward. Why was i so STUPID??
Love is too strong a word. I keep telling myself that the people i met before. They were never real. I dont know now. Fantasy becomes my reality and reality becomes blurred.
Im rather happy with you too.. You came. For me? That's sweet. Awesome. Im sorry. Maybe one day i can whisper to myself at least. The three words i've used so stupidly before.
I...Love...You...
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