Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I Dont Want You

Do you know? Do you think i do?
Right now my mind is a messy and full of confusion. Urgh! Wat is up with me? I cant make up my mind and i feel stupid..
Im sorry. I've played you along on a string. I did. I have. I stopped but now the job is done. You're too friendly. You bother me too much. You're not smart enough. You're not really there. Just a wave of text. I love you. I hate you. You make me happy. You make me sick. I dont know why. You've stopped being a novelty. You're now just another experience.
I NEED HELP!!!
NO ONE UNDERSTANDS!!
coz i dont understand either.
whats wrong with me?!
I wonder if i suffer a weird medical condition where nothing is ever enough? Maybe this exam worry is scrambling my brains.
Seriously, i feel like crying now. I dont know who to talk to.
I cant talk to you coz it would make me vunerable.

You know. Sometimes i think my soppy sad stories are all acts and im the greatest actress ever. I mean everytime i let my heart out, i feel like its not me. Then afterwards, i think i was stupid and how dare i make ppl pity me. Like i manipulated ppl just to get something i subconsiously wanted. I have no idea. I need to visit a shrink.

I need help...or maybe a hot shower..

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