Monday, November 16, 2009

Screw Me. Ugh.

Nerves, nerves, nerves.

I really hate being nervous. Especially when I know that I am nervous but it doesn't outwardly show. I just like the nerves to get over with and then I can get on and do what I have to do.

The nerves always just suddenly come out during the most annoying times.


Like my audition. I had to mess up the 1st song and then only when I felt like I had something to prove did I totally lose all my nerves.

Can I go back to that?

Listening to Gravity by Sara Bareilles now and I feel like I'm gonna cry. It's 11.09pm and if I do, I know my eyes and face will be all puffy. Like it ain't now? Haha..not.

It does feel like a bit of the nerves are dispersing along with my tears though.

Fudge. I wanna cry. If it can get rid of the nervous energy, self-restraint let me cry!

My problem, self-restraint. Watevs I guess.

I wanna practice but I can't cause I'd wake up the entire house. Playing softly has no point right now. Or it seems that way to me. I really should sleep now but I just want the nervous energy to go away.


Nerves, nerves, go away.
Come again another day.
Zureen

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